MMMM..Indian Cinnamon. I love the taste of it. It is richer, more texure, and deeper tasting and more expensive. But it is worth it. I get mine from a spice trader for $50 a kilogram.
Cinnamon is one of the oldest and most flavor filled spices known to man. Cinnamon was once more valuable than gold and has been associated with ancient rituals of sacrifice or pleasure. In Egypt, it was sought for embalming and witchcraft; in medieval Europe for religious rites and as flavouring. References to cinnamon are plenty throughout the Old Testament in the Bible. Later it was the most profitable spice in the Dutch East India Company trade.
The name cinnamon comes from Greek kinnámōmon, from Phoenician and akin to Hebrew qinnâmôn, itself ultimately from a Malaysian language, cf. Malay and Indonesian kayu manis "sweet wood".
Cinnamon is the dried bark of an evergreen busy tree. There is a particular season for pealing of the bark. It is considered superior compared to cassia though they belong to the same class.
Cinnamon is used in a wide variety of foods, beverages, pharmaceuticals, liquors, cosmetics, perfumery and toiletries.
A major ingredient of garam masala, Cinnamon is used whole in Savoury rice dishes. Khadi, a popular yogurt drink in Gujarat and other northern states, has Cinnamon or cassia as one of its ingredients. Cinnamon oil is an international favourite in beverages and perfumery, while Cinnamon oleoresin is a popular flavour for processed foods.
Cinnamon in grown in various parts of southern India and a remarkable quantity is produced from Kerala.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Sunday, April 27, 2008
The Hibiscus
Hibiscuses are very beautiful plants. Canada has only one native hibiscus, the marsh mallow plant. It is a very rare flower in these parts. Pelee Island and Point Pelee National Park are excellent spots to spot these amazing plants. It is found along the marsh shores on both Pelee Island and Point Pelee, but please don't pluck these flowers, as it is designated as "vunerable" in Canada.
The Hibiscus, rich in colour, is a spectable of nature yet for many to behold.
The Hibiscus, rich in colour, is a spectable of nature yet for many to behold.
The Legend of Victor Crowley
Once there was a boy named Victor Crowley. He was born hideously deformed, and sadly, folks weren’t too kind to him. So he spent most of his life hidden in his Daddy’s house out in the bayou. One Halloween night, the local children came throwing firecrackers at the house to tease and scare him. And the old Crowley house caught fire.
When Victor’s Daddy arrived home, the house was in flames. He went to the barn, grabbed himself a hatchet, and started chopping down the front door. But what he didn’t know was that Victor was pressed up against the other side, trying to get out. He hit him square in the face with that hatchet...
...and poor Victor Crowley died.
The old man went into mourning and became a recluse after that. Never to leave the house. Never spoke to anyone. He finally passed away about ten years later.
And that’s when the stories started.
They say people tend to disappear in that swamp. And if you get close enough to the old Crowley house at night, you can still hear Victor Crowley. Still roaming in the woods. Still crying for his Daddy.
--Louisiana Folklore--
When Victor’s Daddy arrived home, the house was in flames. He went to the barn, grabbed himself a hatchet, and started chopping down the front door. But what he didn’t know was that Victor was pressed up against the other side, trying to get out. He hit him square in the face with that hatchet...
...and poor Victor Crowley died.
The old man went into mourning and became a recluse after that. Never to leave the house. Never spoke to anyone. He finally passed away about ten years later.
And that’s when the stories started.
They say people tend to disappear in that swamp. And if you get close enough to the old Crowley house at night, you can still hear Victor Crowley. Still roaming in the woods. Still crying for his Daddy.
--Louisiana Folklore--
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Explanation of the Plum Pudding Model
At the dawn of the 20th century, scientists knew that negatively charged particles existed. Because most atoms have a neutral charge, scientists thought that positive particles might exist to balance the negative particles. They were also curious about how many charged particles were in the atom and how the particles were arranged. Thomson proposed an atomic model in 1904 in response to these curiosities. 
In Thomson’s "Plum Pudding Model" each atom was a sphere filled with a positively charged fluid. The fluid was called the "pudding." Scattered in this fluid were electrons known as the "plums." The radius of the model was 10-10 meters.
Thomson suggested that the positive fluid held the negative charges, the electrons, in the atom because of electrical forces. However, this was only a very vague explanation and failed to provide any definite answers.
In Thomson’s "Plum Pudding Model" each atom was a sphere filled with a positively charged fluid. The fluid was called the "pudding." Scattered in this fluid were electrons known as the "plums." The radius of the model was 10-10 meters.
Thomson suggested that the positive fluid held the negative charges, the electrons, in the atom because of electrical forces. However, this was only a very vague explanation and failed to provide any definite answers.
Friday, April 25, 2008
The Story of La Befana
La Befana
Country of Origin: Italy
The Three Wise Men had traveled long and far in search of Bethlehem. One night of their journey they became lost, and came to the doorstep of the Italian Grandmother Befana to ask for directions.
Befana was consumed with the sweeping and cleaning of her home and quickly dismissed the Wise Men when they told her of their search for the New Born King. Even when they asked her to come with them to pay respects to Jesus, she stubbornly refused. Later in the night a brilliant star appeared in the sky, and it's beauty quickly made Befana realize she had made a terrible mistake.
She gathered up toys and presents for the Christ Child and tried to run after them, but her old legs couldn't catch up with them. In frustration, she wept over the dirty broom that had been her misfortune.
The sincerity of her tears gave the broom new life, and it scooped her up into the night sky to search for the Wise Men she had treated so badly. La Befana has never found the Three Kings or the stable they searched for, but every year on January 6th, the Feast of the Epiphany, she flies over the homes of the children of Italy leaving presents with good boys and girls until she finds the baby Jesus.
Country of Origin: Italy
The Three Wise Men had traveled long and far in search of Bethlehem. One night of their journey they became lost, and came to the doorstep of the Italian Grandmother Befana to ask for directions.
Befana was consumed with the sweeping and cleaning of her home and quickly dismissed the Wise Men when they told her of their search for the New Born King. Even when they asked her to come with them to pay respects to Jesus, she stubbornly refused. Later in the night a brilliant star appeared in the sky, and it's beauty quickly made Befana realize she had made a terrible mistake.
She gathered up toys and presents for the Christ Child and tried to run after them, but her old legs couldn't catch up with them. In frustration, she wept over the dirty broom that had been her misfortune.
The sincerity of her tears gave the broom new life, and it scooped her up into the night sky to search for the Wise Men she had treated so badly. La Befana has never found the Three Kings or the stable they searched for, but every year on January 6th, the Feast of the Epiphany, she flies over the homes of the children of Italy leaving presents with good boys and girls until she finds the baby Jesus.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Starbucks testing $1 coffee, Free refills
Starbucks Corp is testing $1 coffees and free refills, The Wall Street Journal reported on Wednesday, as the global coffee chain faces increasing competition from fast-food rivals.
The report said Starbucks is experimenting with a "short" $1 cup as well as free refills for brewed coffee in its Seattle-area stores. Starbucks charges around $1.50 to $4.00 for a coffee, depending on size and flavour.
Starbucks was not immediately available for comment, but the report quoted the company's spokeswoman.
Shares in Starbucks have lost around half their value over the past year amid worries about U.S. consumer spending, over-expansion, and competition from fast-food rivals such as McDonald's Corp who offer specialty coffees.
The report said that $1 undercut regular coffee prices at both McDonald's and Dunkin' Donuts, a unit of Dunkin' Brands Inc., which start in the low $1 range.
Starbucks announced a management reshuffle earlier this year, bringing Howard Schultz back into the chief executive position. It also said it would close underperforming U.S. outlets and speed up international growth.
Starbucks has around 15,000 stores around the world including over 10,000 in the United States.
Special Thanks to
Reuters
The report said Starbucks is experimenting with a "short" $1 cup as well as free refills for brewed coffee in its Seattle-area stores. Starbucks charges around $1.50 to $4.00 for a coffee, depending on size and flavour.
Starbucks was not immediately available for comment, but the report quoted the company's spokeswoman.
Shares in Starbucks have lost around half their value over the past year amid worries about U.S. consumer spending, over-expansion, and competition from fast-food rivals such as McDonald's Corp who offer specialty coffees.
The report said that $1 undercut regular coffee prices at both McDonald's and Dunkin' Donuts, a unit of Dunkin' Brands Inc., which start in the low $1 range.
Starbucks announced a management reshuffle earlier this year, bringing Howard Schultz back into the chief executive position. It also said it would close underperforming U.S. outlets and speed up international growth.
Starbucks has around 15,000 stores around the world including over 10,000 in the United States.
Special Thanks to
Reuters
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Hobo Symbols
Some hobos now communicate via cellular phones and e-mail. But the classic American hobo of early this century communicated through a much more basic system of marks--a code through which they gave information and warnings to their fellow Knights of the Road. Usually, these signs would be written in chalk or coal on a trestle, fence, building or sidewalk, letting others know what they could expect in the area of the symbol.
For the Full List and Symbols see Hobo Signs & Symbols
For the Full List and Symbols see Hobo Signs & Symbols
More George Carlin
Always do whatever's next.
George Carlin
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
George Carlin
Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
George Carlin
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
George Carlin
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
George Carlin
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
George Carlin
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
George Carlin
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
George Carlin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
George Carlin
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
George Carlin
I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.
George Carlin
I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.
George Carlin
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me - they're cramming for their final exam.
George Carlin
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
George Carlin
I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it.
George Carlin
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.
George Carlin
If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.
George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
George Carlin
If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.
George Carlin
If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
George Carlin
In comic strips, the person on the right always speaks first.
George Carlin
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
George Carlin
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
George Carlin
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
George Carlin
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
George Carlin
Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
George Carlin
One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.
George Carlin
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
George Carlin
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
George Carlin
Religion is just mind control.
George Carlin
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
George Carlin
Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.
George Carlin
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
George Carlin
The status quo sucks.
George Carlin
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.
George Carlin
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
George Carlin
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
George Carlin
Think off-center.
George Carlin
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
George Carlin
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
George Carlin
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
George Carlin
When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
George Carlin
When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
George Carlin
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.
George Carlin
When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.
George Carlin
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
George Carlin
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
George Carlin
George Carlin
At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom.
George Carlin
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
George Carlin
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
George Carlin
Death is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
George Carlin
Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
George Carlin
Dusting is a good example of the futility of trying to put things right. As soon as you dust, the fact of your next dusting has already been established.
George Carlin
Electricity is really just organized lightning.
George Carlin
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
George Carlin
Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.
George Carlin
Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?
George Carlin
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
George Carlin
I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
George Carlin
I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away.
George Carlin
I think it would be interesting if old people got anti-Alzheimer's disease where they slowly began to recover other people's lost memories.
George Carlin
I think people should be allowed to do anything they want. We haven't tried that for a while. Maybe this time it'll work.
George Carlin
I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older; then it dawned on me - they're cramming for their final exam.
George Carlin
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
George Carlin
I'm always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I'm listening to it.
George Carlin
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin
I'm not concerned about all hell breaking loose, but that a PART of hell will break loose... it'll be much harder to detect.
George Carlin
If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter.
George Carlin
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
George Carlin
If we could just find out who's in charge, we could kill him.
George Carlin
If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
George Carlin
In comic strips, the person on the right always speaks first.
George Carlin
Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist.
George Carlin
Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.
George Carlin
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
George Carlin
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
George Carlin
Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.
George Carlin
One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like.
George Carlin
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
George Carlin
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
George Carlin
Religion is just mind control.
George Carlin
Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don't have time for all that.
George Carlin
Standing ovations have become far too commonplace. What we need are ovations where the audience members all punch and kick one another.
George Carlin
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
George Carlin
The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
George Carlin
The status quo sucks.
George Carlin
The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.
George Carlin
There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
George Carlin
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
George Carlin
Think off-center.
George Carlin
Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
George Carlin
Well, if crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? They never mention that part to us, do they?
George Carlin
What does it mean to pre-board? Do you get on before you get on?
George Carlin
When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?
George Carlin
When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent.
George Carlin
When you step on the brakes your life is in your foot's hands.
George Carlin
When you're born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you're born in America, you get a front row seat.
George Carlin
You know an odd feeling? Sitting on the toilet eating a chocolate candy bar.
George Carlin
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
George Carlin
European heatwave caused 35,000 deaths
At least 35,000 people died as a result of the record heatwave that scorched Europe in August 2003, says an environmental think tank.
The Earth Policy Institute (EPI), based in Washington DC, warns that such deaths are likely to increase, as "even more extreme weather events lie ahead".
The EPI calculated the huge death toll from the eight western European countries with data available. "Since reports are not yet available for all European countries, the total heat death toll for the continent is likely to be substantially larger," it says in a statement.
France suffered the worst losses, with 14,802 people dying from causes attributable to the blistering heat. This is "more than 19 times the death toll from the SARS epidemic worldwide", notes the EPI.
Silent killer
August 2003 was the hottest August on record in the northern hemisphere. But projections by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change predict more erratic weather, the EPI notes. By the end of this century, the average world temperature is projected to climb by 1.4 to 5.8°C.
"Though heat waves rarely are given adequate attention, they claim more lives each year than floods, tornadoes, and hurricanes combined," warns the EPI. "Heat waves are a silent killer, mostly affecting the elderly, the very young, or the chronically ill."
The searing August heat claimed about 7000 lives in Germany, nearly 4200 lives in both Spain and Italy. Over 2000 people died in the UK, with the country recording is first ever temperature over 100° Fahrenheit on 10th August.
Cooling mechanisms
High temperatures are well known to result in a rise in deaths, as is cold weather. When the body is subjected to extreme heat, it struggles to maintain its ideal temperature of 37°C. The body attempts to do this by sweating and pumping blood closer to the skin, but high heat and humidity can confound these cooling mechanisms.
If the internal body temperature rises above 40°C, vital organs are at risk and if the body cannot be cooled, death follows.
Over the last 25 years, the average global temperature has risen by 0.6°C. The World Meteorological Organization estimates that the number of heat-related deaths could double in less than 20 years.
The EPI says it is confident that the August heatwave has broken all records for heat-related deaths and says the world must cut the carbon dioxide emissions that contribute to global warming.
Special Yhanks to New Scientist
The Earth Policy Institute (EPI), based in Washington DC, warns that such deaths are likely to increase, as "even more extreme weather events lie ahead".
The EPI calculated the huge death toll from the eight western European countries with data available. "Since reports are not yet available for all European countries, the total heat death toll for the continent is likely to be substantially larger," it says in a statement.
France suffered the worst losses, with 14,802 people dying from causes attributable to the blistering heat. This is "more than 19 times the death toll from the SARS epidemic worldwide", notes the EPI.
Silent killer
August 2003 was the hottest August on record in the northern hemisphere. But projections by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change predict more erratic weather, the EPI notes. By the end of this century, the average world temperature is projected to climb by 1.4 to 5.8°C.
"Though heat waves rarely are given adequate attention, they claim more lives each year than floods, tornadoes, and hurricanes combined," warns the EPI. "Heat waves are a silent killer, mostly affecting the elderly, the very young, or the chronically ill."
The searing August heat claimed about 7000 lives in Germany, nearly 4200 lives in both Spain and Italy. Over 2000 people died in the UK, with the country recording is first ever temperature over 100° Fahrenheit on 10th August.
Cooling mechanisms
High temperatures are well known to result in a rise in deaths, as is cold weather. When the body is subjected to extreme heat, it struggles to maintain its ideal temperature of 37°C. The body attempts to do this by sweating and pumping blood closer to the skin, but high heat and humidity can confound these cooling mechanisms.
If the internal body temperature rises above 40°C, vital organs are at risk and if the body cannot be cooled, death follows.
Over the last 25 years, the average global temperature has risen by 0.6°C. The World Meteorological Organization estimates that the number of heat-related deaths could double in less than 20 years.
The EPI says it is confident that the August heatwave has broken all records for heat-related deaths and says the world must cut the carbon dioxide emissions that contribute to global warming.
Special Yhanks to New Scientist
101 Greatest George Carlin Quotes
I don’t have pet peeves — I have major psychotic fucking hatreds!
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?
I wanna live. I don’t wanna die. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade.
I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I’m an American — you know, you grow.
You can’t fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?
Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
No one knows what’s next, but everybody does it.
There are 400,000 words in the English language, and there are seven you can’t say on television. What a ratio that is! 399,993 to 7. They must really be baaaad. They must be OUTRAGEOUS to be separated from a group that large. “All of you words over here, you seven….baaaad words.” That’s what they told us, right? …You know the seven, don’t ya? That you can’t say on TV? Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.
The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.
Weather forecast for tonight: Dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
If it requires a uniform, it’s a worthless endeavor.
If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.
Reminds me of something my third-grade teacher said to us. She said, “You show me a tropical fruit and I’ll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.”
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is.
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
I knew a transsexual guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
If you’ve got a cat and a leg, you’ve got a happy cat. If you’ve got a cat and two legs, you’ve got a party.
You can prick your finger — just don’t finger your prick.
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
I don’t like to think of laws as rules you have to follow, but more as suggestions.
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front-row seat.
Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.
I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos.
I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don’t trust any organization that has a handbook.
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place? There’s such balance in nature.
So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” Anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It’s a simple philosophy, but it’s always worked in our family.
Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.
Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them; I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.
Beethoven was so hard of hearing, he thought he was a painter.
Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.
I’ve never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.
One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you’re too tired.
If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense?
What year did Jesus think it was?
George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.
Once you leave the womb, conservatives don’t care about you until you reach military age. Then you’re just what they’re looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers.
“One thing leads to another”? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.
No one who has had “Taps” played for them has ever been able to hear it.
Property is theft. Nobody “owns” anything. When you die, it all stays here.
The best thing about living at the water’s edge: You only have assholes on three sides of you, and if they come this way you can hear them splash.
The future will soon be a thing of the past.
The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal,” “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.
Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey.
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.
Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes.
“When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?” This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!
Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.
And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National Institute of Pancakes: It reads, and I quote, “Fuck waffles.”
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Whoever coined the term “Buyer Beware” was probably bleeding from the asshole.
Cloud nine gets all the publicity, but cloud eight actually is cheaper, less crowded, and has a better view.
Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
I’m always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I’m listening to it.
Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin’ ready to hang himself.
The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.
“Meow” means “woof” in cat.
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
“No comment” is a comment.
If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
You can’t argue with a good blowjob.
Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it’s because at the moment they’re not actually dying.
So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.
Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn’t a lot worth paying attention to.
The Golden Gate Bridge should have a long bungee cord for people who aren’t quite ready to commit suicide but want to get in a little practice.
I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
If the cops didn’t see it, I didn’t do it!
Hooray for most things!
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.
I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights.
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Life is a zero sum game.
Somehow I enjoy watching people suffer.
I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.
It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory.
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?
I wanna live. I don’t wanna die. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade.
I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I’m an American — you know, you grow.
You can’t fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.
If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?
Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
No one knows what’s next, but everybody does it.
There are 400,000 words in the English language, and there are seven you can’t say on television. What a ratio that is! 399,993 to 7. They must really be baaaad. They must be OUTRAGEOUS to be separated from a group that large. “All of you words over here, you seven….baaaad words.” That’s what they told us, right? …You know the seven, don’t ya? That you can’t say on TV? Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.
The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”
The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.
Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.
Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.
Weather forecast for tonight: Dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.
If it requires a uniform, it’s a worthless endeavor.
If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.
You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.
Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.
Reminds me of something my third-grade teacher said to us. She said, “You show me a tropical fruit and I’ll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.”
As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is.
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.
The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.
I knew a transsexual guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.
I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.
If you’ve got a cat and a leg, you’ve got a happy cat. If you’ve got a cat and two legs, you’ve got a party.
You can prick your finger — just don’t finger your prick.
By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.
Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?
I don’t like to think of laws as rules you have to follow, but more as suggestions.
I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front-row seat.
Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.
I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos.
I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don’t trust any organization that has a handbook.
I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.
Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place? There’s such balance in nature.
So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” Anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It’s a simple philosophy, but it’s always worked in our family.
Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.
Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”
I love and treasure individuals as I meet them; I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.
Beethoven was so hard of hearing, he thought he was a painter.
Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.
God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.
I’ve never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.
One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you’re too tired.
If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense?
What year did Jesus think it was?
George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.
Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.
In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.
Once you leave the womb, conservatives don’t care about you until you reach military age. Then you’re just what they’re looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers.
“One thing leads to another”? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.
No one who has had “Taps” played for them has ever been able to hear it.
Property is theft. Nobody “owns” anything. When you die, it all stays here.
The best thing about living at the water’s edge: You only have assholes on three sides of you, and if they come this way you can hear them splash.
The future will soon be a thing of the past.
The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal,” “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.
Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey.
The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.
I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.
Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes.
“When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?” This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!
Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.
And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National Institute of Pancakes: It reads, and I quote, “Fuck waffles.”
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Whoever coined the term “Buyer Beware” was probably bleeding from the asshole.
Cloud nine gets all the publicity, but cloud eight actually is cheaper, less crowded, and has a better view.
Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
I’m always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I’m listening to it.
Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin’ ready to hang himself.
The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.
If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.
“Meow” means “woof” in cat.
Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.
Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.
“No comment” is a comment.
If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.
You can’t argue with a good blowjob.
Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it’s because at the moment they’re not actually dying.
So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.
Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.
Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?
When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn’t a lot worth paying attention to.
The Golden Gate Bridge should have a long bungee cord for people who aren’t quite ready to commit suicide but want to get in a little practice.
I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.
If the cops didn’t see it, I didn’t do it!
Hooray for most things!
Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.
I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights.
What was the best thing before sliced bread?
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
Life is a zero sum game.
Somehow I enjoy watching people suffer.
I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.
It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory.
Monday, April 21, 2008
White House Counsel Miers Chosen for Court
Some Question Her Lack of Experience As a Judge
President Bush nominated Harriet Ellan Miers, his White House counsel and former personal attorney, to the Supreme Court in 2005, choosing a woman who broke barriers in the male-dominated Texas legal world but brings no judicial experience or constitutional background to her new assignment.
Bush announced his choice for the nation's 110th justice from the Oval Office shortly before the court opened its new term under newly installed Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. In Bush's nationally televised statement, he simultaneously introduced Miers and defended her legal résumé, which came under immediate attack from some conservative groups.
Harriet Miers leaves a photo opportunity with Senate Minority Leader Harry M. Reid. Conservative lawmakers are divided over Miers's nomination. Story, A11. (By Melina Mara -- The Washington Post)
Campaign for the Court
The Washington Post's Fred Barbash followed the step-by-step process of confirming Judge Samuel A. Alito Jr. to fill Justice Sandra Day O'Connor's seat on the Supreme Court.
In succeeding Justice Sandra Day O'Connor, one of the court's swing voters, Miers would be in a position to move it decisively to the right. Bush said she would bring a distinctive perspective to the high court while strictly interpreting the Constitution and not legislating from the bench.
"In selecting a nominee, I've sought to find an American of grace, judgment and unwavering devotion to the Constitution and laws of our country. Harriet Miers is just such a person," Bush said. "I've known Harriet for more than a decade. I know her heart. I know her character."
The White House appeared to be seeking a smooth confirmation process, bypassing candidates with more established conservative bona fides at a time when Bush is beset with political problems including the Iraq war and Hurricane Katrina. Based on advance soundings with Senate Democratic leader Harry M. Reid (Nev.) and conservative leader James C. Dobson, the White House calculated that Miers would draw broad support.
But yesterday's response to the nominee left that open to doubt. There was widespread dissent among Bush's usual allies on the right, who questioned whether the 60-year-old former corporate lawyer possessed the distinguished qualifications and conservative credentials they are looking for in a court nominee. "It could well be that she is in the tradition of Clarence Thomas or Antonin Scalia, as the president has promised," said Jan LaRue, chief counsel of Concerned Women for America. "The problem is that those of us who were looking for some tangible evidence of that have none, and we can't come out of the box supporting her."
Advocates on the left and their allies in the Senate also urged caution, pronouncing Miers's judicial philosophy and constitutional views a mystery. "We know next to nothing about the legal philosophy of the person President Bush has selected to replace Justice O'Connor casting the deciding votes on the most difficult issues confronting our nation," said Sen. John F. Kerry (D-Mass.). "America can't afford a replay of the unrevealing confirmation process that preceded Chief Justice Roberts's confirmation."
White House officials yesterday were emphasizing previous praise Miers had won from Democrats. As part of a bipartisan delegation of Senate leaders at the White House on Sept. 21, Reid told Bush that Miers "is worthy of consideration," according to aides of people at the meeting, and the senator spoke warmly of her yesterday -- though without making any specific commitment to support her. Some Senate Democrats privately expressed dismay that Reid had given the White House cover for a nominee they expect to oppose.
Bush described Miers, who if confirmed would be the third woman to sit on the Supreme Court, as a legal pioneer who repeatedly overcame gender barriers to reach the highest levels of her profession. Before being named White House counsel last year, she served as White House deputy chief of staff as well as staff secretary, a job in which she reviewed virtually every document that went before the president.
Before joining the Bush administration, Miers was Bush's personal attorney in Texas and served as general counsel of his gubernatorial campaign committee. As governor, Bush appointed Miers chairman of the scandal-plagued Texas Lottery Commission, where she earned a reputation as a tough manager after firing two executive directors.
Outside her political work for Bush, Miers was a partner at the Texas law firm of Locke Liddell & Sapp, served two years on the Dallas City Council and was the first woman to be head of the Texas Bar Association.
"One of the things that I believe the president admires about Harriet is that she has spent her entire career breaking through glass ceilings," said James B. Francis Jr., who heads a Dallas investment firm and introduced Miers to Bush in 1993.
Special Thanks to Washington Post
President Bush nominated Harriet Ellan Miers, his White House counsel and former personal attorney, to the Supreme Court in 2005, choosing a woman who broke barriers in the male-dominated Texas legal world but brings no judicial experience or constitutional background to her new assignment.
Bush announced his choice for the nation's 110th justice from the Oval Office shortly before the court opened its new term under newly installed Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. In Bush's nationally televised statement, he simultaneously introduced Miers and defended her legal résumé, which came under immediate attack from some conservative groups.
Harriet Miers leaves a photo opportunity with Senate Minority Leader Harry M. Reid. Conservative lawmakers are divided over Miers's nomination. Story, A11. (By Melina Mara -- The Washington Post)
Campaign for the Court
The Washington Post's Fred Barbash followed the step-by-step process of confirming Judge Samuel A. Alito Jr. to fill Justice Sandra Day O'Connor's seat on the Supreme Court.
In succeeding Justice Sandra Day O'Connor, one of the court's swing voters, Miers would be in a position to move it decisively to the right. Bush said she would bring a distinctive perspective to the high court while strictly interpreting the Constitution and not legislating from the bench.
"In selecting a nominee, I've sought to find an American of grace, judgment and unwavering devotion to the Constitution and laws of our country. Harriet Miers is just such a person," Bush said. "I've known Harriet for more than a decade. I know her heart. I know her character."
The White House appeared to be seeking a smooth confirmation process, bypassing candidates with more established conservative bona fides at a time when Bush is beset with political problems including the Iraq war and Hurricane Katrina. Based on advance soundings with Senate Democratic leader Harry M. Reid (Nev.) and conservative leader James C. Dobson, the White House calculated that Miers would draw broad support.
But yesterday's response to the nominee left that open to doubt. There was widespread dissent among Bush's usual allies on the right, who questioned whether the 60-year-old former corporate lawyer possessed the distinguished qualifications and conservative credentials they are looking for in a court nominee. "It could well be that she is in the tradition of Clarence Thomas or Antonin Scalia, as the president has promised," said Jan LaRue, chief counsel of Concerned Women for America. "The problem is that those of us who were looking for some tangible evidence of that have none, and we can't come out of the box supporting her."
Advocates on the left and their allies in the Senate also urged caution, pronouncing Miers's judicial philosophy and constitutional views a mystery. "We know next to nothing about the legal philosophy of the person President Bush has selected to replace Justice O'Connor casting the deciding votes on the most difficult issues confronting our nation," said Sen. John F. Kerry (D-Mass.). "America can't afford a replay of the unrevealing confirmation process that preceded Chief Justice Roberts's confirmation."
White House officials yesterday were emphasizing previous praise Miers had won from Democrats. As part of a bipartisan delegation of Senate leaders at the White House on Sept. 21, Reid told Bush that Miers "is worthy of consideration," according to aides of people at the meeting, and the senator spoke warmly of her yesterday -- though without making any specific commitment to support her. Some Senate Democrats privately expressed dismay that Reid had given the White House cover for a nominee they expect to oppose.
Bush described Miers, who if confirmed would be the third woman to sit on the Supreme Court, as a legal pioneer who repeatedly overcame gender barriers to reach the highest levels of her profession. Before being named White House counsel last year, she served as White House deputy chief of staff as well as staff secretary, a job in which she reviewed virtually every document that went before the president.
Before joining the Bush administration, Miers was Bush's personal attorney in Texas and served as general counsel of his gubernatorial campaign committee. As governor, Bush appointed Miers chairman of the scandal-plagued Texas Lottery Commission, where she earned a reputation as a tough manager after firing two executive directors.
Outside her political work for Bush, Miers was a partner at the Texas law firm of Locke Liddell & Sapp, served two years on the Dallas City Council and was the first woman to be head of the Texas Bar Association.
"One of the things that I believe the president admires about Harriet is that she has spent her entire career breaking through glass ceilings," said James B. Francis Jr., who heads a Dallas investment firm and introduced Miers to Bush in 1993.
Special Thanks to Washington Post
Saturday, April 19, 2008
UN Millenium Development Goals
1. Eradicate extreme poverty and hunger.
2. Achieve universal primary education.
3. Promote gender equality and empower women.
4. Reduce child morality.
5. Improve maternal health.
6. Combat HIV/AIDS, malaria and other diseases.
7. Ensure environmental stability.
8. Develop a global partnership for development.
2. Achieve universal primary education.
3. Promote gender equality and empower women.
4. Reduce child morality.
5. Improve maternal health.
6. Combat HIV/AIDS, malaria and other diseases.
7. Ensure environmental stability.
8. Develop a global partnership for development.
Monroe sex tape sells for £760,000
A 15-minute film clip of late movie legend Marilyn Monroe in a compromising position with an unknown man was sold to an anonymous businessman for $1.5 million (£760,000).
Rumours have persisted that the man in the video clip is assassinated US President John F Kennedy, who was allegedly having a sexual relationship with the Some Like It Hot star.
The film is a copy of a 1950s black-and-white 16-mm clip owned by the Federal Bureau of Investigation.
Memorabilia collector Keya Morgan said he recently arranged the sale of the film on behlaf of the son of a dead FBI informant to a wealthy Manhattan businessman who wants to protect Monroe's privacy.
Mr Morgan said: "The gentleman who bought it said out respect for Marilyn he's not going to make a joke of it and put it on the Internet and try to exploit her.
"That's not his intention and I would never get my name involved if that were to happen."
Mr Morgan is a well-known collector of memorabilia from the estates of Monroe and her ex-husband Joe DiMaggio.
He claims to be friends with Monroe's other two husbands, Jim Dougherty and Arthur Miller.
Monroe was found dead in 1962 and many conspiracy theorists believe she was murdered because of relationships with JFK and his brother Robert Kennedy.
Rumours have persisted that the man in the video clip is assassinated US President John F Kennedy, who was allegedly having a sexual relationship with the Some Like It Hot star.
The film is a copy of a 1950s black-and-white 16-mm clip owned by the Federal Bureau of Investigation.
Memorabilia collector Keya Morgan said he recently arranged the sale of the film on behlaf of the son of a dead FBI informant to a wealthy Manhattan businessman who wants to protect Monroe's privacy.
Mr Morgan said: "The gentleman who bought it said out respect for Marilyn he's not going to make a joke of it and put it on the Internet and try to exploit her.
"That's not his intention and I would never get my name involved if that were to happen."
Mr Morgan is a well-known collector of memorabilia from the estates of Monroe and her ex-husband Joe DiMaggio.
He claims to be friends with Monroe's other two husbands, Jim Dougherty and Arthur Miller.
Monroe was found dead in 1962 and many conspiracy theorists believe she was murdered because of relationships with JFK and his brother Robert Kennedy.
Marilyn Monroe sex tape sold for 1.5 million
A sex tape of screen goddess Marilyn Monroe has sold for a whopping 1.5 million dollars - but the new owner is adamant that people will not get to see it. The 15-minute black and white video was said to have been shot in the 1950s, before the sultry star became famous the world over. The tape, which was found by memorabilia collector Keya Morgan as he researched a documentary on the star, shows Monroe performing a sex act on an unidentified man.
He said that there was no doubt about the actress' identity."You see instantly it's Marilyn Monroe - she has the famous mole. She's radiant," The Sun quoted him, as saying. Morgan came to know about the tape from an ex-FBI agent who told him about an informant who tipped off the spy agency about its existence in the 1960s, a time when then FBI chief J Edgar Hoover was trying to prove that the sultry star was involved with President John F Kennedy or his brother Bobby.
Download Wallpapers, Screensavers....
Edited declassified FBI documents state the informant "exhibited to agents a motion picture which depicted Marilyn Monroe committing a perverted act." Morgan revealed that this informant made a copy of the porn tape, which went to his son after his death. Morgan traced the son and acted as broker in the sale of the video to a New York businessman, who plans to lock it away to protect Monroe's reputation.
"I'm just going to lock it up. I'm not going to sell it out of respect," Morgan quoted the businessman as telling him. According to declassified documents, Marilyn's ex husband, baseball hero Joe DiMaggio, also tried to buy the film for 12,000 pounds but failed in his attempts.
He said that there was no doubt about the actress' identity."You see instantly it's Marilyn Monroe - she has the famous mole. She's radiant," The Sun quoted him, as saying. Morgan came to know about the tape from an ex-FBI agent who told him about an informant who tipped off the spy agency about its existence in the 1960s, a time when then FBI chief J Edgar Hoover was trying to prove that the sultry star was involved with President John F Kennedy or his brother Bobby.
Download Wallpapers, Screensavers....
Edited declassified FBI documents state the informant "exhibited to agents a motion picture which depicted Marilyn Monroe committing a perverted act." Morgan revealed that this informant made a copy of the porn tape, which went to his son after his death. Morgan traced the son and acted as broker in the sale of the video to a New York businessman, who plans to lock it away to protect Monroe's reputation.
"I'm just going to lock it up. I'm not going to sell it out of respect," Morgan quoted the businessman as telling him. According to declassified documents, Marilyn's ex husband, baseball hero Joe DiMaggio, also tried to buy the film for 12,000 pounds but failed in his attempts.
The First Movie Featuring Marilyn Monroe Is A Sex Tape
Humans have probably always enjoyed sex as more than just a series of motions towards procreation. An experience that has such potential for us, not only for pleasure, but also for the intimate link it can create between two people, is bound to inspire creative work. And sex has been artistically represented since before the wheel was invented.
We do know that humans have been creating paintings, drawings, and sculpture depicting sex and sexualized people since the Stone Age.
Professor Kuntz, an UCLA expert in Hollywood’s history declares that "Monroe was a star with a great ambition of success".
It seems that the first erotic movie exists in a museum from Hollywood, a museum focused mainly on erotic art. There can be found a recording with a woman having sex with a man on a couch. The woman in question is, according to "Hollywood’s Erotic Museum", Marilyn Monroe. The tape is dated 1948. On the same museum the last acquisition is a 14 minute length recording with very explicit sex between Colin Farell and an ex-Playboy star.
We do know that humans have been creating paintings, drawings, and sculpture depicting sex and sexualized people since the Stone Age.
Professor Kuntz, an UCLA expert in Hollywood’s history declares that "Monroe was a star with a great ambition of success".
It seems that the first erotic movie exists in a museum from Hollywood, a museum focused mainly on erotic art. There can be found a recording with a woman having sex with a man on a couch. The woman in question is, according to "Hollywood’s Erotic Museum", Marilyn Monroe. The tape is dated 1948. On the same museum the last acquisition is a 14 minute length recording with very explicit sex between Colin Farell and an ex-Playboy star.
Ig Nobel Prizes and Their Winners by Year
A parody of the Nobel Prizes, the Ig Nobel Prizes and are given each year in early October — around the time the recipients of the genuine Nobel Prizes are announced — for ten achievements that "first make people laugh, and then make them think." Commenting on the 2006 awards, Marc Abrahams, editor of Annals of Improbable Research, co-sponsor of the awards, said: "The prizes are intended to celebrate the unusual, honour the imaginative - and spur people's interest in science, medicine and technology." All prizes are awarded for real achievements (except for three in 1991 and one in 1994 due to an erroneous press release).
1991
Biology - Robert Klark Graham, selector of seeds and prophet of propagation, for his pioneering development of the Repository for Germinal Choice, a sperm bank that accepts donations only from Nobellians and Olympians.
Chemistry - Jacques Benveniste, prolific proselytizer and dedicated correspondent of Nature, for his persistent discovery that water, H2O, is an intelligent liquid, and for demonstrating to his satisfaction that water is able to remember events long after all traces of those events have vanished.
Economics - Michael Milken, titan of Wall Street and father of the junk bond, to whom the world is indebted.
Education - J. Danforth Quayle, consumer of time and occupier of space (as well as the U.S. Vice President from 1989-93), for demonstrating, better than anyone else, the need for science education.
Literature - Erich von Däniken, visionary raconteur and author of Chariots of the Gods?, for explaining how human civilization was influenced by ancient astronauts from outer space.
Medicine - Alan Kligerman, deviser of digestive deliverance, vanquisher of vapor, and inventor of Beano, for his pioneering work with anti-gas liquids that prevent bloat, gassiness, discomfort and embarrassment.
Peace - Edward Teller, father of the hydrogen bomb and first champion of the Star Wars weapons system, for his lifelong efforts to change the meaning of peace as we know it.
Apocryphal achievements
The first nomination also featured three fictional recipients for fictional achievements.
Interdisciplinary research: Josiah S. Carberry, for his work in psychoceramics, the study of "cracked pots."
Pedestrian technology: Paul DeFanti, "wizard of structures and crusader for public safety, for his invention of the Buckybonnet, a geodesic fashion structure that pedestrians wear to protect their heads and preserve their composure".
Physics: Thomas Kyle, for his discovery of "the heaviest element in the universe, Administratium"
1992
Archeology - Eclaireurs de France (a French Scouting organization), removers of graffiti, for damaging the prehistoric paintings of two Bisons in the Cave of Mayrière supérieure near the French village of Bruniquel.
Art - Presented jointly to Jim Knowlton, modern Renaissance man, for his classic anatomy poster "Penises of the Animal Kingdom," and to the U.S. National Endowment for the Arts, for encouraging Mr. Knowlton to extend his work in the form of a pop-up book.
Biology - Dr. Cecil Jacobson, relentlessly generous sperm donor, and prolific patriarch of sperm banking, for devising a simple, single-handed method of quality control.
Chemistry - Ivette Bassa, constructor of colorful colloids, for her role in the crowning achievement of twentieth century chemistry, the synthesis of bright blue Jell-O.
Economics - The investors of Lloyd's of London, heirs to 300 years of dull prudent management, for their bold attempt to insure disaster by refusing to pay for their company's losses.
Literature - Yuri Struchkov,unstoppable author from the Institute of Organoelement Compounds in Moscow, for the 948 scientific papers he published between the years 1981 and 1990, averaging more than one every 3.9 days.
Medicine - F. Kanda, E. Yagi, M. Fukuda, K. Nakajima, T. Ohta, and O. Nakata of the Shiseido Research Center in Yokohama, for their pioneering research study "Elucidation of Chemical Compounds Responsible for Foot Malodour," especially for their conclusion that people who think they have foot odor do, and those who don't, don't.
Nutrition - The utilizers of SPAM, courageous consumers of canned comestibles, for 54 years of undiscriminating digestion.
Peace - Daryl Gates, former police chief of the City of Los Angeles, for his uniquely compelling methods of bringing people together.
Physics - David Chorley and Doug Bower, lions of low-energy physics, for their circular contributions to field theory based on the geometrical destruction of English crops.
1993
Biology - Presented jointly to Paul Williams Jr. of the Oregon State Health Division and Kenneth W. Newel of the Liverpool School of Tropical Medicine, bold biological detectives, for their pioneering study, "Salmonella Excretion in Joy-Riding Pigs".
Chemistry - Presented jointly to James Campbell and Gaines Campbell of Lookout Mountain, Tennessee, dedicated deliverers of fragrance, for inventing scent strips, the odious method by which perfume is applied to magazine pages.
Consumer Engineering - Presented to Ron Popeil, incessant inventor and perpetual pitchman of late night television, for redefining the industrial revolution with such devices as the Veg-O-Matic, the Pocket Fisherman, Mr. Microphone, and the Inside-the-Shell Egg Scrambler.
Economics - Presented to Ravi Batra of Southern Methodist University, shrewd economist and best-selling author of The Great Depression of 1990 and Surviving the Great Depression of 1990, for selling enough copies of his books to single-handedly prevent worldwide economic collapse.
Literature - Presented to E. Topol, R. Califf, F. Van de Werf, P. W. Armstrong, and their 972 co-authors, for publishing a medical research paper which has one hundred times as many authors as pages. The authors are from the following countries: Australia, Belgium, Canada, France, Germany, Ireland, Israel, Luxembourg, the Netherlands, New Zealand, Poland, Spain, Switzerland, the United Kingdom, and the United States.
Mathematics - Presented to Robert W. Faid of Greenville, South Carolina, farsighted and faithful seer of statistics, for calculating the exact odds (860,609,175,188, 282,100 to 1) that Mikhail Gorbachev is the Antichrist.
Medicine - Presented to James F. Nolan, Thomas J. Stillwell, and John P. Sands, Jr., medical men of mercy, for their painstaking research report, "Acute Management of the Zipper-Entrapped Penis."
Peace - The Pepsi-Cola Company of the Philippines, for sponsoring a contest to create a millionaire, and then announcing the wrong winning number, thereby inciting and uniting 800,000 riotously expectant winners, and bringing many warring factions together for the first time in their nation's history.
Physics - Presented to Corentin Louis Kervran of France, ardent admirer of alchemy, for his conclusion that the calcium in chickens' eggshells is created by a process of cold fusion.
Psychology - Presented jointly to John Edward Mack of Harvard Medical School and David M. Jacobs of Temple University, for their conclusion that people who believe they were kidnapped by aliens from outer space, probably were — and especially for their conclusion, "the focus of the abduction is the production of children".
Visionary Technology - Presented jointly to Jay Schiffman of Farmington Hills, Michigan, crack inventor of AutoVision, an image projection device that makes it possible to drive a car and watch television at the same time, and to the Michigan State Legislature, for making it legal to do so.
1994
Biology - Presented to W. Brian Sweeney, Brian Krafte-Jacobs, Jeffrey W. Britton, and Wayne Hansen, for their breakthrough study, "The Constipated Serviceman: Prevalence Among Deployed US Troops," and especially for their numerical analysis of bowel movement frequency.
Chemistry - Presented to Texas State Senator Bob Glasgow, wise writer of logical legislation, for sponsoring the 1989 drug control law which makes it illegal to purchase beakers, flasks, test tubes, or other laboratory glassware without a permit.
Economics - Presented to Juan Pablo Davila of Chile, tireless trader of financial futures and former employee of the state-owned Codelco Company, for instructing his computer to "buy" when he meant "sell." He subsequently attempted to recoup his losses by making increasingly unprofitable trades that ultimately lost 0.5 percent of Chile's gross national product. Davila's relentless achievement inspired his countrymen to coin a new verb, "davilar", meaning "to botch things up royally."
Entomology - Presented to Robert A. Lopez of Westport, NY, valiant veterinarian and friend of all creatures great and small, for his series of experiments in obtaining ear mites from cats, inserting them into his own ear, and carefully observing and analyzing the results.
Literature - Presented to L. Ron Hubbard, ardent author of science fiction and founding father of Scientology, for his crackling Good Book, Dianetics, which is highly profitable to mankind — or to a portion thereof.
Mathematics - Presented to The Southern Baptist Church of Alabama, mathematical measurers of morality, for their county-by-county estimate of how many Alabama citizens will go to Hell if they don't repent.
Medicine - Two prizes. First, to Patient X, formerly of the US Marine Corps, valiant victim of a venomous bite from his pet rattlesnake, for his determined use of electroshock therapy. At his own insistence, automobile spark plug wires were attached to his lip, and the car engine revved to 3,000 rpm for five minutes. Second, to Dr. Richard C. Dart of the Rocky Mountain Poison Center and Dr. Richard A. Gustafson of The University of Arizona Health Sciences Center, for their well-grounded medical report, "Failure of Electric Shock Treatment for Rattlesnake Envenomation."
Peace - Presented to John Hagelin of Maharishi University and The Institute of Science, Technology and Public Policy, for his experimental conclusion that 4,000 trained meditators caused an 18 percent decrease in violent crime in Washington, D.C.
Psychology - Presented to Lee Kuan Yew, former Prime Minister of Singapore, for his thirty-year study of the effects of punishing three million citizens of Singapore whenever they spat, chewed gum, or fed pigeons.
Apocryphal achievements, no longer officially listed
Physics - Presented to The Japanese Meteorological Agency, for its seven-year study of whether earthquakes are caused by catfish wiggling their tails. This winner is not officially listed, as it was based on what turned out to be erroneous press accounts.
1995
Chemistry - Presented to Bijan Pakzad of Beverly Hills, for creating DNA Cologne and DNA Perfume, neither of which contain deoxyribonucleic acid, and both of which come in a triple helix bottle.
Dentistry - Presented to Robert H. Beaumont, of Shoreview, Minnesota, for his incisive study "Patient Preference for Waxed or Unwaxed Dental Floss."
Economics - Presented jointly to Nick Leeson and his superiors at Barings Bank and to Robert Citron of Orange County, California for using the calculus of derivatives to demonstrate that every financial institution has its limits.
Literature -Presented to David B. Busch and James R. Starling, of Madison, Wisconsin, for their research report, "Rectal Foreign Bodies: Case Reports and a Comprehensive Review of the World's Literature." The citations include reports of, among other items: seven light bulbs; a knife sharpener; two flashlights; a wire spring; a snuff box; an oil can with potato stopper; eleven different forms of fruits, vegetables and other foodstuffs; a jeweler's saw; a frozen pig's tail; a tin cup; a beer glass; and one patient's remarkable ensemble collection consisting of spectacles, a suitcase key, a tobacco pouch and a magazine.
Medicine - Presented to Marcia E. Buebel, David S. Shannahoff-Khalsa, and Michael R. Boyle, for their study entitled "The Effects of Unilateral Forced Nostril Breathing on Cognition."
Nutrition - Presented to John Martinez of J. Martinez & Company in Atlanta, for Luak Coffee, the world's most expensive coffee, which is made from coffee beans ingested and excreted by the luak, a bobcat-like animal native to Indonesia.
Peace - Presented to the Taiwan National Parliament, for demonstrating that politicians gain more by punching, kicking and gouging each other than by waging war against other nations.
Physics - Presented to Dominique M.R. Georget, R. Parker, and Andrew C. Smith of Norwich, England, for their rigorous analysis of soggy breakfast cereal. It was published in the report entitled "A Study of the Effects of Water Content on the Compaction Behaviour of Breakfast Cereal Flakes."
Psychology - Presented to Shigeru Watanabe, Junko Sakamoto, and Masumi Wakita, of Keio University, for their success in training pigeons to discriminate between the paintings of Picasso and those of Monet.
Public Health - Presented to Martha Kold Bakkevig of Sintef Unimed in Trondheim, Norway, and Ruth Nielsen of the Technical University of Denmark, for their exhaustive study, "Impact of Wet Underwear on Thermoregulatory Responses and Thermal Comfort in the Cold."
1996
Art - Presented to Don Featherstone of Fitchburg, Massachusetts, for his ornamentally evolutionary invention, the plastic pink flamingo.
Biodiversity - Presented to Chonosuke Okamura of the Okamura Fossil Laboratory in Nagoya, Japan, for discovering the fossils of dinosaurs, horses, dragons, and more than one thousand other extinct "mini-species," each of which less than 0.25 mm in length.
Biology - Presented jointly to Anders Barheim and Hogne Sandvik of the University of Bergen, Norway, for their report, "Effect of Ale, Garlic, and Soured Cream on the Appetite of Leeches."
Chemistry - Presented to George Goble of Purdue University, for his blistering world record time for igniting a barbecue grill: three seconds, using charcoal and liquid oxygen.
Economics - Presented to Dr. Robert J. Genco of the University at Buffalo for his discovery that "financial strain is a risk indicator for destructive periodontal disease."
Literature - Presented to the editors of the journal Social Text for eagerly publishing research that they could not understand, that the author said was meaningless, and which claimed that reality does not exist.
Medicine - Presented to James Johnston of R.J. Reynolds, Joseph Taddeo of U.S. Tobacco, Andrew Tisch of Lorillard, William Campbell of Philip Morris, Edward A. Horrigan of Liggett Group, Donald S. Johnston of American Tobacco Company, and Thomas E. Sandefur, Jr., chairman of Brown and Williamson Tobacco Company, for their unshakable discovery, as testified to the U.S. Congress, that nicotine is not addictive.
Peace - Presented to Jacques Chirac, President of France, for commemorating the fiftieth anniversary of Hiroshima with atomic bomb tests in the Pacific.
Physics - Presented to Robert Matthews of Aston University, England, for his studies of Murphy's Law, and especially for demonstrating that toast often falls on the buttered side.
Public Health - Presented to Ellen Kleist of Nuuk, Greenland and Harald Moi of Oslo, Norway, for their cautionary medical report "Transmission of Gonorrhea Through an Inflatable Doll."
1997
Astronomy - Presented to Richard C. Hoagland of New Jersey, for identifying artificial features on the moon and on Mars, including a human face on Mars and ten-mile high buildings on the far side of the moon.
Biology - Presented to T. Yagyu and his colleagues from the University Hospital of Zurich, Switzerland, the Kansai Medical University in Osaka, Japan, and the Neuroscience Technology Research in Prague, Czech Republic, for measuring people's brainwave patterns while they chewed different flavors of gum.[5]
Communications - Presented to Sanford Wallace, president of Cyber Promotions of Philadelphia. Nothing has stopped this self-appointed courier from delivering electronic junk mail to all the world.
Economics - Presented to Akihiro Yokoi of Wiz Company in Chiba, Japan, and Aki Maita of Bandai Company in Tokyo, for diverting millions of person-hours of work into the husbandry of virtual pets.
Entomology - Presented to Mark Hostetler of the University of Florida, for his book, That Gunk on Your Car, which identifies the insect splats that appear on automobile windows.
Literature - Presented to Doron Witztum, Eliyahu Rips, and Yoav Rosenberg of Israel, and to Michael Drosnin of the United States, for their statistical discovery that the Bible contains a secret, hidden code.
Medicine - Presented to Carl J. Charnetski and Francis X. Brennan, Jr. of Wilkes University, and James F. Harrison of Muzak Ltd. in Seattle, Washington, for their discovery that listening to Muzak stimulates immunity system production and thus may help prevent the common cold.
Meteorology - Presented to Bernard Vonnegut of the State University of New York at Albany, for his report, "Chicken Plucking as Measure of Tornado Wind Speed."
Peace - Presented to Harold Hillman of the University of Surrey, England, for his report "The Possible Pain Experienced During Execution by Different Methods."
Physics - Presented to John Bockris of Texas A&M University, for his achievements in cold fusion, in the transmutation of base elements into gold, and in the electrochemical incineration of domestic rubbish.
1998
Chemistry - Presented to Jacques Benveniste of France, for his homeopathic discovery that not only does water have memory, but that the information can be transmitted over telephone lines and the Internet.
Biology - Presented to Peter Fong of Gettysburg College, Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, for contributing to the happiness of clams by giving them Prozac.
Economics - Presented to Richard Seed of Chicago for his efforts to stoke up the world economy by cloning himself and other human beings.
Literature - Presented to Dr. Mara Sidoli of Washington, DC, for her illuminating report, "Farting as a Defence Against Unspeakable Dread".
Medicine - Presented to Patient Y and to his doctors, Caroline Mills, Meirion Llewelyn, David Kelly, and Peter Holt, of Royal Gwent Hospital, in Newport for the cautionary medical report, "A Man Who Pricked His Finger and Smelled Putrid for 5 Years."
Peace - Presented to Prime Minister of India, Shri Atal Bihari Vajpayee and Prime Minister of Pakistan, Nawaz Sharif, for their aggressively peaceful explosions of atomic bombs.
Physics - Presented to Deepak Chopra of The Chopra Center for Well Being, La Jolla, California, for his unique interpretation of quantum physics as it applies to life, liberty, and the pursuit of economic happiness.
Safety Engineering - Presented to Troy Hurtubise, of North Bay, Ontario, for developing and personally testing a suit of armor that is impervious to grizzly bears.
Science Education - Presented to Dolores Krieger, Professor Emerita, New York University, for demonstrating the merits of therapeutic touch, a method by which nurses manipulate the energy fields of ailing patients by carefully avoiding physical contact with those patients.
Statistics - Presented to Jerald Bain of Mt. Sinai Hospital in Toronto and Kerry Siminoski of the University of Alberta, for their carefully measured report, "The Relationship Among Height, Penile Length, and Foot Size".
1999
Biology - Presented to Dr. Paul Bosland, director of The Chili Pepper Institute, New Mexico State University, Las Cruces, New Mexico, for breeding a spiceless jalapeño chili pepper.
Chemistry - Presented to Takeshi Makino, president of The Safety Detective Agency in Osaka, Japan, for his involvement with S-Check, an infidelity detection spray that wives can apply to their husbands' underwear.
Environmental Protection - Presented to Hyuk-ho Kwon of Kolon Company of Seoul, South Korea, for inventing the self-perfuming business suit.
Literature - Presented to the British Standards Institution for its six-page specification (BS 6008) of the proper way to make a cup of tea.
Managed Health Care - Presented to George Blonsky and Charlotte Blonsky of New York City and San Jose, California, for inventing a device (U.S. Patent 3,216,423 ) to aid women in giving birth -- the woman is strapped onto a circular table, and the table is then rotated at high speed.
Medicine - Presented to Dr. Arvid Vatle of Stord, Norway, for carefully collecting, classifying, and contemplating which kinds of containers his patients chose when submitting urine samples.
Peace - Presented to Charl Fourie and Michelle Wong of Johannesburg, South Africa, for inventing the Blaster, an automobile burglar alarm consisting of a detection circuit and a flamethrower.
Physics - Presented to Dr. Len Fisher of Bath, England and Sydney, Australia for calculating the optimal way to dunk a biscuit. Also, to Professor Jean-Marc Vanden-Broeck of the University of East Anglia, England, and Belgium, for calculating how to make a teapot spout that does not drip.
Science Education - Presented to the Kansas State Board of Education and the Colorado State Board of Education, for mandating that children should not believe in Darwin's theory of evolution any more than they believe in Newton's theory of gravitation, Faraday's and Maxwell's theory of electromagnetism, or Pasteur's theory that germs cause disease.
Sociology - Presented to Steve Penfold, of York University in Toronto, for doing his Ph.D. thesis on the history of Canadian donut shops.
2000
Biology - Presented to Richard Wassersug of Dalhousie University, for his firsthand report, "On the Comparative Palatability of Some Dry-Season Tadpoles from Costa Rica".
Chemistry - Presented to Donatella Marazziti, Alessandra Rossi, and Giovanni B. Cassano of the University of Pisa, Italy, and Hagop S. Akiskal of the University of California, San Diego, for their discovery that, biochemically, romantic love may be indistinguishable from having severe obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Computer Science - Presented to Chris Niswander of Tucson, Arizona, for inventing PawSense, software that detects when a cat is walking across your computer keyboard.
Economics - Presented to The Reverend Sun Myung Moon, for bringing efficiency and steady growth to the mass marriage industry, with, according to his reports, a 36-couple wedding in 1960, a 430-couple wedding in 1968, an 1800-couple wedding in 1975, a 6000-couple wedding in 1982, a 30,000-couple wedding in 1992, a 360,000-couple wedding in 1995, and a 36,000,000-couple wedding in 1997.
Literature - Presented to Jasmuheen (formerly known as Ellen Greve) of Australia, first lady of Breatharianism, for her book Living on Light, which explains that although some people do eat food, they don't ever really need to.
Medicine - Presented to Willibrord Weijmar Schultz, Pek van Andel, and Eduard Mooyaart of Groningen, the Netherlands, and Ida Sabelis of Amsterdam, for their illuminating report, "Magnetic Resonance Imaging of Male and Female Genitals During Coitus and Female Sexual Arousal."
Peace - Presented to The British Royal Navy, for ordering its sailors to stop using live cannon shells, and to instead just shout "Bang!"
Physics - Presented to André Geim of the University of Nijmegen, the Netherlands, and Sir Michael Berry of Bristol University, England, for using magnets to levitate a frog and a sumo wrestler.
Psychology - Presented to David Dunning of Cornell University and Justin Kreuger of the University of Illinois, for their modest report, "Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments".
Public Health - Presented to Jonathan Wyatt, Gordon McNaughton, and William Tullet of Glasgow, for their alarming report, "The Collapse of Toilets in Glasgow".
2001
Astrophysics - Presented to Dr. Jack Van Impe and Rexella Van Impe of Jack Van Impe Ministries, Rochester Hills, Michigan, for their discovery that black holes fulfill all the technical requirements for the location of Hell.
Biology - Presented to Buck Weimer of Pueblo, Colorado for inventing Under-Ease, airtight underwear with a replaceable charcoal filter that removes bad-smelling gases before they escape.
Economics - Presented to Joel Slemrod, of the University of Michigan Business School, and Wojciech Kopczuk, of the University of British Columbia, for their conclusion that people find a way to postpone their deaths if that would qualify them for a lower rate on the inheritance tax.
Literature - Presented to John Richards of Boston, England, founder of The Apostrophe Protection Society, for his efforts to protect, promote, and defend the differences between the plural and the possessive.
Medicine - Presented to Peter Barss of McGill University, Canada, for his impactful medical report "Injuries Due to Falling Coconuts".
Peace - Presented to Viliumas Malinauskas of Grutas, Lithuania, for creating the amusement park known as "Stalin World".
Physics - Presented to David Schmidt of the University of Massachusetts, for his partial explanation of the shower-curtain effect: a shower curtain tends to billow inwards while a shower is being taken.
Psychology - Presented to Lawrence W. Sherman of Miami University, Ohio, for his influential research report "An Ecological Study of Glee in Small Groups of Preschool Children".
Public Health - Presented to Chittaranjan Andrade and B.S. Srihari of the National Institute of Mental Health and Neurosciences, Bangalore, India, for their probing medical discovery that nose picking is a common activity among adolescents.
Technology - Presented jointly to John Keogh of Hawthorn, Victoria, Australia, for patenting the wheel in the year 2001, and to the Australian Patent Office for granting him Innovation Patent #2001100012.
2002
Biology - Presented to Norma E. Bubier, Charles G.M. Paxton, Phil Bowers, and D. Charles Deeming of the United Kingdom, for their report "Courtship Behaviour of Ostriches Towards Humans Under Farming Conditions in Britain".
Chemistry - Presented to Theodore Gray of Wolfram Research, in Champaign, Illinois, for gathering many elements of the periodic table, and assembling them into the form of a four-legged periodic table table.
Economics - Presented to the executives, corporate directors, and auditors of Enron, Lernaut & Hauspie (Belgium), Adelphia, Bank of Commerce and Credit International (Pakistan), Cendant, CMS Energy, Duke Energy, Dynegy, Gazprom (Russia), Global Crossing, HIH Insurance (Australia), Informix, Kmart, Maxwell Communications (UK), McKessonHBOC, Merrill Lynch, Merck, Peregrine Systems, Qwest Communications, Reliant Resources, Rent-Way, Rite Aid, Sunbeam, Tyco, Waste Management, WorldCom, Xerox, and Arthur Andersen, for adapting the mathematical concept of imaginary numbers for use in the business world. (All companies except for Arthur Andersen were forced to restate their financial reports due to false or incorrect accounting. Andersen was the accounting firm most identified with the scandals, having been indicted on criminal charges stemming from its actions as auditor of Enron. All companies are U.S.-based unless otherwise noted.)
Hygiene - Presented to Eduardo Segura, of Lavakan de Aste, in Tarragona, Spain, for inventing a washing machine for cats and dogs.
Interdisciplinary Research - Presented to Karl Kruszelnicki of The University of Sydney, Australia, for performing a comprehensive survey of human belly button fluff -- who gets it, when, what color, and how much.
Literature - Presented jointly to Vicki L. Silvers of the University of Nevada-Reno and David S. Kreiner of Central Missouri State University, for their colorful report "The Effects of Pre-Existing Inappropriate Highlighting on Reading Comprehension".
Mathematics - Presented to K.P. Sreekumar and G. Nirmalan of Kerala Agricultural University, India, for their analytical report "Estimation of the Total Surface Area in Indian Elephants".
Medicine - Presented to Chris McManus of University College London, for his excruciatingly balanced report, "Scrotal Asymmetry in Man and in Ancient Sculpture".
Peace - Presented to Keita Sato, President of Takara Co., Dr. Matsumi Suzuki, President of Japan Acoustic Lab, and Dr. Norio Kogure, Executive Director, Kogure Veterinary Hospital, for promoting peace and harmony between the species by inventing Bow-Lingual, a computer-based automatic dog-to-human language translation device.
Physics - Presented to Arnd Leike of the University of Munich, for demonstrating that beer froth obeys the Mathematical Law of Exponential Decay.
2003
Biology - Presented to C.W. Moeliker, of Natuurmuseum Rotterdam, for documenting the first scientifically recorded case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck.
Chemistry - Presented to Yukio Hirose of Kanazawa University, for his chemical investigation of a bronze statue, in the city of Kanazawa, that fails to attract pigeons.
Economics - Presented to Karl Schwärzler and the nation of Liechtenstein, for making it possible to rent the entire country for corporate conventions, weddings, bar mitzvahs, and other gatherings.
Engineering - Presented to John Paul Stapp, Edward A. Murphy, Jr., and George Nichols, for jointly giving birth in 1949 to Murphy's Law, the basic engineering principle that "If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, someone will do it" (or, in other words: "If anything can go wrong, it will").
Interdisciplinary Research - Presented to Stefano Ghirlanda, Liselotte Jansson, and Magnus Enquis of Stockholm University, for their inevitable report "Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans."
Literature - Presented to John Trinkaus, of the Zicklin School of Business, New York City, for meticulously collecting data and publishing more than 80 detailed academic reports about things that annoyed him, such as:
What percentage of young people wear baseball caps with the peak facing to the rear rather than to the front
What percentage of pedestrians wear sport shoes that are white rather than some other color
What percentage of swimmers swim laps in the shallow end of a pool rather than the deep end
What percentage of automobile drivers almost, but not completely, come to a stop at one particular stop-sign
What percentage of commuters carry attaché cases
What percentage of shoppers exceed the number of items permitted in a supermarket's express checkout lane
And what percentage of students dislike the taste of Brussels sprouts.
Medicine - Presented to Eleanor Maguire, David Gadian, Ingrid Johnsrude, Catriona Good, John Ashburner, Richard Frackowiak, and Christopher Frith of University College London, for presenting evidence that the hippocampi of London taxi drivers are more highly developed than those of their fellow citizens.
Peace - Presented to Lal Bihari, of Uttar Pradesh, India, for a triple accomplishment: First, for leading an active life even though he has been declared legally dead; second, for waging a lively posthumous campaign against bureaucratic inertia and greedy relatives; and third, for creating the Association of Dead People. Lal Bihari overcame the handicap of being dead, and managed to obtain a passport from the Indian government so that he could travel to Harvard to accept his Prize. However, the U.S. government refused to allow him into the country. His friend Madhu Kapoor therefore came to the Ig Nobel Ceremony and accepted the Prize on behalf of Lal Bihari. Several weeks later, the Prize was presented to Lal Bihari himself in a special ceremony in India.
Physics - Presented to Jack Harvey, John Culveno, Warren Payne, Steve Cowle, Michael Lawrance, David Stuart, and Robyn Williams of Australia, for their irresistible report "An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces".
Psychology - Presented to Gian Vittorio Caprara and Claudio Barbaranelli of the University of Rome La Sapienza, and to Philip Zimbardo of Stanford University, for their discerning report "Politicians' Uniquely Simple Personalities".
2004
Biology - Presented to Ben Wilson of the University of British Columbia, Lawrence Dill of Simon Fraser University, Canada, Robert Batty of the Scottish Association for Marine Science, Magnus Whalberg of the University of Aarhus, Denmark, and Håkan Westerberg of Sweden's National Board of Fisheries, for showing that herrings apparently communicate by farting.
Chemistry - Presented to The Coca-Cola Company of Great Britain, for using advanced technology to convert liquid from the River Thames into Dasani, a transparent form of water, which for precautionary reasons has been made unavailable to consumers.
Economics - Presented to the Vatican, for outsourcing prayers to India.
Engineering - Presented jointly to Donald J. Smith and his father, Frank J. Smith, of Orlando, Florida, for patenting the comb over (U.S. Patent 4,022,227 )
Literature - Presented to The American Nudist Research Library of Kissimmee, Florida, for preserving nudist history so that everyone can see it.
Medicine - Presented jointly to Steven Stack of Wayne State University, Detroit, Michigan, and James Gundlach of Auburn University, Auburn, Alabama, for their published report "The Effect of Country Music on Suicide".
Peace - Presented to Daisuke Inoue of Hyōgo Prefecture, Japan, for inventing karaoke, thereby providing an entirely new way for people to learn to tolerate each other.
Physics - Presented jointly to Ramesh Balasubramaniam of the University of Ottawa, and Michael Turvey of the University of Connecticut and Haskins Laboratory, for exploring and explaining the dynamics of hula-hooping.
Psychology - Presented jointly to Daniel Simons of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign and Christopher Chabris of Harvard University, for demonstrating that when people pay close attention to something, it's all too easy to overlook anything else -- even a woman in a gorilla suit. [See inattentional blindness]
Public Health - Presented to Jillian Clarke of the Chicago High School for Agricultural Sciences, and then Howard University, for investigating the scientific validity of the five-second rule about whether it's safe to eat food that's been dropped on the floor.
2005
Agricultural History - Presented to James Watson of Massey University, New Zealand, for his scholarly study, "The Significance of Mr. Richard Buckley's Exploding Trousers".
Biology - Presented jointly to Benjamin Smith of the University of Adelaide, Australia and the University of Toronto, Canada and the Firmenich perfume company, Geneva, Switzerland, and ChemComm Enterprises, Archamps, France; Craig Williams of James Cook University and the University of South Australia; Michael Tyler of the University of Adelaide; Brian Williams of the University of Adelaide; and Yoji Hayasaka of the Australian Wine Research Institute; for painstakingly smelling and cataloging the peculiar odors produced by 131 different species of frogs when the frogs were feeling stressed.
Chemistry - Presented jointly to Edward Cussler of the University of Minnesota and Brian Gettelfinger of the University of Minnesota and the University of Wisconsin-Madison, for conducting a careful experiment to settle the longstanding scientific question: can people swim faster in syrup or in water? It was found that swimmers in the experiment reach comparable velocity in both media.
Economics - Presented to Gauri Nanda of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, for inventing Clocky, an alarm clock that runs away and hides, repeatedly, thus ensuring that people DO get out of bed, and thus theoretically adding many productive hours to the workday.
Fluid Dynamics - Presented jointly to Victor Benno Meyer-Rochow of International University Bremen, Germany and the University of Oulu, Finland; and József Gál of Loránd Eötvös University, Hungary, for using basic principles of physics to calculate the pressure that builds up inside a penguin, as detailed in their report "Pressures Produced When Penguins Poo — Calculations on Avian Defecation".
Literature - Presented to the Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters — General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others — each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.
Medicine - Presented to Gregg A. Miller of Oak Grove, Missouri, in the U.S.A., for inventing Neuticles — artificial replacement testicles for dogs, which are available in three sizes, and three degrees of firmness.
Nutrition - Presented to Dr. Yoshiro Nakamatsu of Tokyo, Japan, for photographing and retrospectively analyzing every meal he has consumed during a period of 34 years (and counting).
Peace - Presented jointly to Claire Rind and Peter Simmons of University of Newcastle, in the UK, for electrically monitoring the activity of a brain cell in a locust while that locust was watching selected highlights from the movie Star Wars.
Physics - Presented jointly to John Mainstone and Thomas Parnell of the University of Queensland, Australia, for patiently conducting the so-called pitch drop experiment that began in the year 1927 — in which a glob of congealed black tar pitch has been slowly, slowly dripping through a funnel, at a rate of approximately one drop every nine years.
2006
Acoustics: D. Lynn Halpern of Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates, and Brandeis University, and Northwestern University, Randolph Blake of Vanderbilt University and Northwestern University and James Hillenbrand of Western Michigan University and Northwestern University for conducting experiments to learn why people dislike the sound of fingernails scraping chalkboard.
Biology: Bart Knols of Wageningen Agricultural University, in Wageningen, the Netherlands; and of the National Institute for Medical Research / Ifakara Centre, Tanzania, and of the International Atomic Energy Agency, in Vienna, Austria) and Ruurd de Jong of Wageningen Agricultural University and of Santa Maria degli Angeli, Italy for showing that the female malaria mosquito Anopheles gambiae is attracted equally to the smell of limburger cheese and to the smell of human feet.
Chemistry: Antonio Mulet, José Javier Benedito and José Bon of the Polytechnic University of Valencia, Spain, and Carmen Rosselló of the University of Illes Balears, in Palma de Mallorca, Spain, for their study "Ultrasonic Velocity in Cheddar Cheese as Affected by Temperature".
Literature: Daniel M. Oppenheimer of Princeton University for his report "Consequences of Erudite Vernacular Utilized Irrespective of Necessity: Problems with Using Long Words Needlessly".
Mathematics: Nic Svenson and Piers Barnes of the Australian Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organization, for calculating the number of photographs must be taken to (almost) ensure that nobody in a group photo will have their eyes closed.
Medicine: Francis M. Fesmire of the University of Tennessee College of Medicine, for his medical case report "Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage"; and Majed Odeh, Harry Bassan, and Arie Oliven of Bnai Zion Medical Center, Haifa, Israel, for their subsequent medical case report also titled "Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage".
Nutrition: Wasmia Al-Houty of Kuwait University and Faten Al-Mussalam of the Kuwait Environment Public Authority, for showing that dung beetles are finicky eaters.
Ornithology: Ivan R. Schwab, of the University of California Davis, and Philip R.A. May of the University of California Los Angeles, for exploring and explaining why woodpeckers don't get headaches.
Peace: Howard Stapleton of Merthyr Tydfil, Wales, for inventing an electromechanical teenager repellant -- a device that makes annoying high-pitched noise designed to be audible to teenagers but not to adults; and for later using that same technology to make telephone ringtones that are audible to teenagers but probably not to their teachers.
Physics: Basile Audoly and Sebastien Neukirch of the Université Pierre et Marie Curie, for their analysis that explains why spaghetti breaks into several pieces when it is bent.
2007
Aviation: Patricia V. Agostino, Santiago A. Plano and Diego A. Golombek, for discovering that hamsters recover from jetlag more quickly when given Viagra.
Biology: Johanna E.M.H. van Bronswijk, for taking a census of all the mites and other life forms that live in people's beds.
Chemistry: Mayu Yamamoto for extracting vanilla flavour from cow dung.
Economics: Kuo Cheng Hsieh, for patenting a device to catch bank robbers by ensnaring them in a net.
Linguistics: Juan Manuel Toro, Josep B. Trobalon and Nuria Sebastian-Galles, for determining that rats sometimes can't distinguish between recordings of Japanese and Dutch played backward.
Literature: Glenda Browne, for her study of the word "the".[14]
Medicine: Dan Meyer and Brian Witcombe, for investigating the side-effects of swallowing swords.
Nutrition: Brian Wansink, for investigating people's appetite for mindless eating by secretly feeding them a self-refilling bowl of soup.
Peace: The Air Force Wright Laboratory in Dayton, Ohio, for suggesting the research and development of a "gay bomb," which would cause enemy troops to become sexually attracted to each other.
Physics: L. Mahadevan and Enrique Cerda Villablanca for their theoretical study of how sheets become wrinkled.
1991
Biology - Robert Klark Graham, selector of seeds and prophet of propagation, for his pioneering development of the Repository for Germinal Choice, a sperm bank that accepts donations only from Nobellians and Olympians.
Chemistry - Jacques Benveniste, prolific proselytizer and dedicated correspondent of Nature, for his persistent discovery that water, H2O, is an intelligent liquid, and for demonstrating to his satisfaction that water is able to remember events long after all traces of those events have vanished.
Economics - Michael Milken, titan of Wall Street and father of the junk bond, to whom the world is indebted.
Education - J. Danforth Quayle, consumer of time and occupier of space (as well as the U.S. Vice President from 1989-93), for demonstrating, better than anyone else, the need for science education.
Literature - Erich von Däniken, visionary raconteur and author of Chariots of the Gods?, for explaining how human civilization was influenced by ancient astronauts from outer space.
Medicine - Alan Kligerman, deviser of digestive deliverance, vanquisher of vapor, and inventor of Beano, for his pioneering work with anti-gas liquids that prevent bloat, gassiness, discomfort and embarrassment.
Peace - Edward Teller, father of the hydrogen bomb and first champion of the Star Wars weapons system, for his lifelong efforts to change the meaning of peace as we know it.
Apocryphal achievements
The first nomination also featured three fictional recipients for fictional achievements.
Interdisciplinary research: Josiah S. Carberry, for his work in psychoceramics, the study of "cracked pots."
Pedestrian technology: Paul DeFanti, "wizard of structures and crusader for public safety, for his invention of the Buckybonnet, a geodesic fashion structure that pedestrians wear to protect their heads and preserve their composure".
Physics: Thomas Kyle, for his discovery of "the heaviest element in the universe, Administratium"
1992
Archeology - Eclaireurs de France (a French Scouting organization), removers of graffiti, for damaging the prehistoric paintings of two Bisons in the Cave of Mayrière supérieure near the French village of Bruniquel.
Art - Presented jointly to Jim Knowlton, modern Renaissance man, for his classic anatomy poster "Penises of the Animal Kingdom," and to the U.S. National Endowment for the Arts, for encouraging Mr. Knowlton to extend his work in the form of a pop-up book.
Biology - Dr. Cecil Jacobson, relentlessly generous sperm donor, and prolific patriarch of sperm banking, for devising a simple, single-handed method of quality control.
Chemistry - Ivette Bassa, constructor of colorful colloids, for her role in the crowning achievement of twentieth century chemistry, the synthesis of bright blue Jell-O.
Economics - The investors of Lloyd's of London, heirs to 300 years of dull prudent management, for their bold attempt to insure disaster by refusing to pay for their company's losses.
Literature - Yuri Struchkov,unstoppable author from the Institute of Organoelement Compounds in Moscow, for the 948 scientific papers he published between the years 1981 and 1990, averaging more than one every 3.9 days.
Medicine - F. Kanda, E. Yagi, M. Fukuda, K. Nakajima, T. Ohta, and O. Nakata of the Shiseido Research Center in Yokohama, for their pioneering research study "Elucidation of Chemical Compounds Responsible for Foot Malodour," especially for their conclusion that people who think they have foot odor do, and those who don't, don't.
Nutrition - The utilizers of SPAM, courageous consumers of canned comestibles, for 54 years of undiscriminating digestion.
Peace - Daryl Gates, former police chief of the City of Los Angeles, for his uniquely compelling methods of bringing people together.
Physics - David Chorley and Doug Bower, lions of low-energy physics, for their circular contributions to field theory based on the geometrical destruction of English crops.
1993
Biology - Presented jointly to Paul Williams Jr. of the Oregon State Health Division and Kenneth W. Newel of the Liverpool School of Tropical Medicine, bold biological detectives, for their pioneering study, "Salmonella Excretion in Joy-Riding Pigs".
Chemistry - Presented jointly to James Campbell and Gaines Campbell of Lookout Mountain, Tennessee, dedicated deliverers of fragrance, for inventing scent strips, the odious method by which perfume is applied to magazine pages.
Consumer Engineering - Presented to Ron Popeil, incessant inventor and perpetual pitchman of late night television, for redefining the industrial revolution with such devices as the Veg-O-Matic, the Pocket Fisherman, Mr. Microphone, and the Inside-the-Shell Egg Scrambler.
Economics - Presented to Ravi Batra of Southern Methodist University, shrewd economist and best-selling author of The Great Depression of 1990 and Surviving the Great Depression of 1990, for selling enough copies of his books to single-handedly prevent worldwide economic collapse.
Literature - Presented to E. Topol, R. Califf, F. Van de Werf, P. W. Armstrong, and their 972 co-authors, for publishing a medical research paper which has one hundred times as many authors as pages. The authors are from the following countries: Australia, Belgium, Canada, France, Germany, Ireland, Israel, Luxembourg, the Netherlands, New Zealand, Poland, Spain, Switzerland, the United Kingdom, and the United States.
Mathematics - Presented to Robert W. Faid of Greenville, South Carolina, farsighted and faithful seer of statistics, for calculating the exact odds (860,609,175,188, 282,100 to 1) that Mikhail Gorbachev is the Antichrist.
Medicine - Presented to James F. Nolan, Thomas J. Stillwell, and John P. Sands, Jr., medical men of mercy, for their painstaking research report, "Acute Management of the Zipper-Entrapped Penis."
Peace - The Pepsi-Cola Company of the Philippines, for sponsoring a contest to create a millionaire, and then announcing the wrong winning number, thereby inciting and uniting 800,000 riotously expectant winners, and bringing many warring factions together for the first time in their nation's history.
Physics - Presented to Corentin Louis Kervran of France, ardent admirer of alchemy, for his conclusion that the calcium in chickens' eggshells is created by a process of cold fusion.
Psychology - Presented jointly to John Edward Mack of Harvard Medical School and David M. Jacobs of Temple University, for their conclusion that people who believe they were kidnapped by aliens from outer space, probably were — and especially for their conclusion, "the focus of the abduction is the production of children".
Visionary Technology - Presented jointly to Jay Schiffman of Farmington Hills, Michigan, crack inventor of AutoVision, an image projection device that makes it possible to drive a car and watch television at the same time, and to the Michigan State Legislature, for making it legal to do so.
1994
Biology - Presented to W. Brian Sweeney, Brian Krafte-Jacobs, Jeffrey W. Britton, and Wayne Hansen, for their breakthrough study, "The Constipated Serviceman: Prevalence Among Deployed US Troops," and especially for their numerical analysis of bowel movement frequency.
Chemistry - Presented to Texas State Senator Bob Glasgow, wise writer of logical legislation, for sponsoring the 1989 drug control law which makes it illegal to purchase beakers, flasks, test tubes, or other laboratory glassware without a permit.
Economics - Presented to Juan Pablo Davila of Chile, tireless trader of financial futures and former employee of the state-owned Codelco Company, for instructing his computer to "buy" when he meant "sell." He subsequently attempted to recoup his losses by making increasingly unprofitable trades that ultimately lost 0.5 percent of Chile's gross national product. Davila's relentless achievement inspired his countrymen to coin a new verb, "davilar", meaning "to botch things up royally."
Entomology - Presented to Robert A. Lopez of Westport, NY, valiant veterinarian and friend of all creatures great and small, for his series of experiments in obtaining ear mites from cats, inserting them into his own ear, and carefully observing and analyzing the results.
Literature - Presented to L. Ron Hubbard, ardent author of science fiction and founding father of Scientology, for his crackling Good Book, Dianetics, which is highly profitable to mankind — or to a portion thereof.
Mathematics - Presented to The Southern Baptist Church of Alabama, mathematical measurers of morality, for their county-by-county estimate of how many Alabama citizens will go to Hell if they don't repent.
Medicine - Two prizes. First, to Patient X, formerly of the US Marine Corps, valiant victim of a venomous bite from his pet rattlesnake, for his determined use of electroshock therapy. At his own insistence, automobile spark plug wires were attached to his lip, and the car engine revved to 3,000 rpm for five minutes. Second, to Dr. Richard C. Dart of the Rocky Mountain Poison Center and Dr. Richard A. Gustafson of The University of Arizona Health Sciences Center, for their well-grounded medical report, "Failure of Electric Shock Treatment for Rattlesnake Envenomation."
Peace - Presented to John Hagelin of Maharishi University and The Institute of Science, Technology and Public Policy, for his experimental conclusion that 4,000 trained meditators caused an 18 percent decrease in violent crime in Washington, D.C.
Psychology - Presented to Lee Kuan Yew, former Prime Minister of Singapore, for his thirty-year study of the effects of punishing three million citizens of Singapore whenever they spat, chewed gum, or fed pigeons.
Apocryphal achievements, no longer officially listed
Physics - Presented to The Japanese Meteorological Agency, for its seven-year study of whether earthquakes are caused by catfish wiggling their tails. This winner is not officially listed, as it was based on what turned out to be erroneous press accounts.
1995
Chemistry - Presented to Bijan Pakzad of Beverly Hills, for creating DNA Cologne and DNA Perfume, neither of which contain deoxyribonucleic acid, and both of which come in a triple helix bottle.
Dentistry - Presented to Robert H. Beaumont, of Shoreview, Minnesota, for his incisive study "Patient Preference for Waxed or Unwaxed Dental Floss."
Economics - Presented jointly to Nick Leeson and his superiors at Barings Bank and to Robert Citron of Orange County, California for using the calculus of derivatives to demonstrate that every financial institution has its limits.
Literature -Presented to David B. Busch and James R. Starling, of Madison, Wisconsin, for their research report, "Rectal Foreign Bodies: Case Reports and a Comprehensive Review of the World's Literature." The citations include reports of, among other items: seven light bulbs; a knife sharpener; two flashlights; a wire spring; a snuff box; an oil can with potato stopper; eleven different forms of fruits, vegetables and other foodstuffs; a jeweler's saw; a frozen pig's tail; a tin cup; a beer glass; and one patient's remarkable ensemble collection consisting of spectacles, a suitcase key, a tobacco pouch and a magazine.
Medicine - Presented to Marcia E. Buebel, David S. Shannahoff-Khalsa, and Michael R. Boyle, for their study entitled "The Effects of Unilateral Forced Nostril Breathing on Cognition."
Nutrition - Presented to John Martinez of J. Martinez & Company in Atlanta, for Luak Coffee, the world's most expensive coffee, which is made from coffee beans ingested and excreted by the luak, a bobcat-like animal native to Indonesia.
Peace - Presented to the Taiwan National Parliament, for demonstrating that politicians gain more by punching, kicking and gouging each other than by waging war against other nations.
Physics - Presented to Dominique M.R. Georget, R. Parker, and Andrew C. Smith of Norwich, England, for their rigorous analysis of soggy breakfast cereal. It was published in the report entitled "A Study of the Effects of Water Content on the Compaction Behaviour of Breakfast Cereal Flakes."
Psychology - Presented to Shigeru Watanabe, Junko Sakamoto, and Masumi Wakita, of Keio University, for their success in training pigeons to discriminate between the paintings of Picasso and those of Monet.
Public Health - Presented to Martha Kold Bakkevig of Sintef Unimed in Trondheim, Norway, and Ruth Nielsen of the Technical University of Denmark, for their exhaustive study, "Impact of Wet Underwear on Thermoregulatory Responses and Thermal Comfort in the Cold."
1996
Art - Presented to Don Featherstone of Fitchburg, Massachusetts, for his ornamentally evolutionary invention, the plastic pink flamingo.
Biodiversity - Presented to Chonosuke Okamura of the Okamura Fossil Laboratory in Nagoya, Japan, for discovering the fossils of dinosaurs, horses, dragons, and more than one thousand other extinct "mini-species," each of which less than 0.25 mm in length.
Biology - Presented jointly to Anders Barheim and Hogne Sandvik of the University of Bergen, Norway, for their report, "Effect of Ale, Garlic, and Soured Cream on the Appetite of Leeches."
Chemistry - Presented to George Goble of Purdue University, for his blistering world record time for igniting a barbecue grill: three seconds, using charcoal and liquid oxygen.
Economics - Presented to Dr. Robert J. Genco of the University at Buffalo for his discovery that "financial strain is a risk indicator for destructive periodontal disease."
Literature - Presented to the editors of the journal Social Text for eagerly publishing research that they could not understand, that the author said was meaningless, and which claimed that reality does not exist.
Medicine - Presented to James Johnston of R.J. Reynolds, Joseph Taddeo of U.S. Tobacco, Andrew Tisch of Lorillard, William Campbell of Philip Morris, Edward A. Horrigan of Liggett Group, Donald S. Johnston of American Tobacco Company, and Thomas E. Sandefur, Jr., chairman of Brown and Williamson Tobacco Company, for their unshakable discovery, as testified to the U.S. Congress, that nicotine is not addictive.
Peace - Presented to Jacques Chirac, President of France, for commemorating the fiftieth anniversary of Hiroshima with atomic bomb tests in the Pacific.
Physics - Presented to Robert Matthews of Aston University, England, for his studies of Murphy's Law, and especially for demonstrating that toast often falls on the buttered side.
Public Health - Presented to Ellen Kleist of Nuuk, Greenland and Harald Moi of Oslo, Norway, for their cautionary medical report "Transmission of Gonorrhea Through an Inflatable Doll."
1997
Astronomy - Presented to Richard C. Hoagland of New Jersey, for identifying artificial features on the moon and on Mars, including a human face on Mars and ten-mile high buildings on the far side of the moon.
Biology - Presented to T. Yagyu and his colleagues from the University Hospital of Zurich, Switzerland, the Kansai Medical University in Osaka, Japan, and the Neuroscience Technology Research in Prague, Czech Republic, for measuring people's brainwave patterns while they chewed different flavors of gum.[5]
Communications - Presented to Sanford Wallace, president of Cyber Promotions of Philadelphia. Nothing has stopped this self-appointed courier from delivering electronic junk mail to all the world.
Economics - Presented to Akihiro Yokoi of Wiz Company in Chiba, Japan, and Aki Maita of Bandai Company in Tokyo, for diverting millions of person-hours of work into the husbandry of virtual pets.
Entomology - Presented to Mark Hostetler of the University of Florida, for his book, That Gunk on Your Car, which identifies the insect splats that appear on automobile windows.
Literature - Presented to Doron Witztum, Eliyahu Rips, and Yoav Rosenberg of Israel, and to Michael Drosnin of the United States, for their statistical discovery that the Bible contains a secret, hidden code.
Medicine - Presented to Carl J. Charnetski and Francis X. Brennan, Jr. of Wilkes University, and James F. Harrison of Muzak Ltd. in Seattle, Washington, for their discovery that listening to Muzak stimulates immunity system production and thus may help prevent the common cold.
Meteorology - Presented to Bernard Vonnegut of the State University of New York at Albany, for his report, "Chicken Plucking as Measure of Tornado Wind Speed."
Peace - Presented to Harold Hillman of the University of Surrey, England, for his report "The Possible Pain Experienced During Execution by Different Methods."
Physics - Presented to John Bockris of Texas A&M University, for his achievements in cold fusion, in the transmutation of base elements into gold, and in the electrochemical incineration of domestic rubbish.
1998
Chemistry - Presented to Jacques Benveniste of France, for his homeopathic discovery that not only does water have memory, but that the information can be transmitted over telephone lines and the Internet.
Biology - Presented to Peter Fong of Gettysburg College, Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, for contributing to the happiness of clams by giving them Prozac.
Economics - Presented to Richard Seed of Chicago for his efforts to stoke up the world economy by cloning himself and other human beings.
Literature - Presented to Dr. Mara Sidoli of Washington, DC, for her illuminating report, "Farting as a Defence Against Unspeakable Dread".
Medicine - Presented to Patient Y and to his doctors, Caroline Mills, Meirion Llewelyn, David Kelly, and Peter Holt, of Royal Gwent Hospital, in Newport for the cautionary medical report, "A Man Who Pricked His Finger and Smelled Putrid for 5 Years."
Peace - Presented to Prime Minister of India, Shri Atal Bihari Vajpayee and Prime Minister of Pakistan, Nawaz Sharif, for their aggressively peaceful explosions of atomic bombs.
Physics - Presented to Deepak Chopra of The Chopra Center for Well Being, La Jolla, California, for his unique interpretation of quantum physics as it applies to life, liberty, and the pursuit of economic happiness.
Safety Engineering - Presented to Troy Hurtubise, of North Bay, Ontario, for developing and personally testing a suit of armor that is impervious to grizzly bears.
Science Education - Presented to Dolores Krieger, Professor Emerita, New York University, for demonstrating the merits of therapeutic touch, a method by which nurses manipulate the energy fields of ailing patients by carefully avoiding physical contact with those patients.
Statistics - Presented to Jerald Bain of Mt. Sinai Hospital in Toronto and Kerry Siminoski of the University of Alberta, for their carefully measured report, "The Relationship Among Height, Penile Length, and Foot Size".
1999
Biology - Presented to Dr. Paul Bosland, director of The Chili Pepper Institute, New Mexico State University, Las Cruces, New Mexico, for breeding a spiceless jalapeño chili pepper.
Chemistry - Presented to Takeshi Makino, president of The Safety Detective Agency in Osaka, Japan, for his involvement with S-Check, an infidelity detection spray that wives can apply to their husbands' underwear.
Environmental Protection - Presented to Hyuk-ho Kwon of Kolon Company of Seoul, South Korea, for inventing the self-perfuming business suit.
Literature - Presented to the British Standards Institution for its six-page specification (BS 6008) of the proper way to make a cup of tea.
Managed Health Care - Presented to George Blonsky and Charlotte Blonsky of New York City and San Jose, California, for inventing a device (U.S. Patent 3,216,423 ) to aid women in giving birth -- the woman is strapped onto a circular table, and the table is then rotated at high speed.
Medicine - Presented to Dr. Arvid Vatle of Stord, Norway, for carefully collecting, classifying, and contemplating which kinds of containers his patients chose when submitting urine samples.
Peace - Presented to Charl Fourie and Michelle Wong of Johannesburg, South Africa, for inventing the Blaster, an automobile burglar alarm consisting of a detection circuit and a flamethrower.
Physics - Presented to Dr. Len Fisher of Bath, England and Sydney, Australia for calculating the optimal way to dunk a biscuit. Also, to Professor Jean-Marc Vanden-Broeck of the University of East Anglia, England, and Belgium, for calculating how to make a teapot spout that does not drip.
Science Education - Presented to the Kansas State Board of Education and the Colorado State Board of Education, for mandating that children should not believe in Darwin's theory of evolution any more than they believe in Newton's theory of gravitation, Faraday's and Maxwell's theory of electromagnetism, or Pasteur's theory that germs cause disease.
Sociology - Presented to Steve Penfold, of York University in Toronto, for doing his Ph.D. thesis on the history of Canadian donut shops.
2000
Biology - Presented to Richard Wassersug of Dalhousie University, for his firsthand report, "On the Comparative Palatability of Some Dry-Season Tadpoles from Costa Rica".
Chemistry - Presented to Donatella Marazziti, Alessandra Rossi, and Giovanni B. Cassano of the University of Pisa, Italy, and Hagop S. Akiskal of the University of California, San Diego, for their discovery that, biochemically, romantic love may be indistinguishable from having severe obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Computer Science - Presented to Chris Niswander of Tucson, Arizona, for inventing PawSense, software that detects when a cat is walking across your computer keyboard.
Economics - Presented to The Reverend Sun Myung Moon, for bringing efficiency and steady growth to the mass marriage industry, with, according to his reports, a 36-couple wedding in 1960, a 430-couple wedding in 1968, an 1800-couple wedding in 1975, a 6000-couple wedding in 1982, a 30,000-couple wedding in 1992, a 360,000-couple wedding in 1995, and a 36,000,000-couple wedding in 1997.
Literature - Presented to Jasmuheen (formerly known as Ellen Greve) of Australia, first lady of Breatharianism, for her book Living on Light, which explains that although some people do eat food, they don't ever really need to.
Medicine - Presented to Willibrord Weijmar Schultz, Pek van Andel, and Eduard Mooyaart of Groningen, the Netherlands, and Ida Sabelis of Amsterdam, for their illuminating report, "Magnetic Resonance Imaging of Male and Female Genitals During Coitus and Female Sexual Arousal."
Peace - Presented to The British Royal Navy, for ordering its sailors to stop using live cannon shells, and to instead just shout "Bang!"
Physics - Presented to André Geim of the University of Nijmegen, the Netherlands, and Sir Michael Berry of Bristol University, England, for using magnets to levitate a frog and a sumo wrestler.
Psychology - Presented to David Dunning of Cornell University and Justin Kreuger of the University of Illinois, for their modest report, "Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments".
Public Health - Presented to Jonathan Wyatt, Gordon McNaughton, and William Tullet of Glasgow, for their alarming report, "The Collapse of Toilets in Glasgow".
2001
Astrophysics - Presented to Dr. Jack Van Impe and Rexella Van Impe of Jack Van Impe Ministries, Rochester Hills, Michigan, for their discovery that black holes fulfill all the technical requirements for the location of Hell.
Biology - Presented to Buck Weimer of Pueblo, Colorado for inventing Under-Ease, airtight underwear with a replaceable charcoal filter that removes bad-smelling gases before they escape.
Economics - Presented to Joel Slemrod, of the University of Michigan Business School, and Wojciech Kopczuk, of the University of British Columbia, for their conclusion that people find a way to postpone their deaths if that would qualify them for a lower rate on the inheritance tax.
Literature - Presented to John Richards of Boston, England, founder of The Apostrophe Protection Society, for his efforts to protect, promote, and defend the differences between the plural and the possessive.
Medicine - Presented to Peter Barss of McGill University, Canada, for his impactful medical report "Injuries Due to Falling Coconuts".
Peace - Presented to Viliumas Malinauskas of Grutas, Lithuania, for creating the amusement park known as "Stalin World".
Physics - Presented to David Schmidt of the University of Massachusetts, for his partial explanation of the shower-curtain effect: a shower curtain tends to billow inwards while a shower is being taken.
Psychology - Presented to Lawrence W. Sherman of Miami University, Ohio, for his influential research report "An Ecological Study of Glee in Small Groups of Preschool Children".
Public Health - Presented to Chittaranjan Andrade and B.S. Srihari of the National Institute of Mental Health and Neurosciences, Bangalore, India, for their probing medical discovery that nose picking is a common activity among adolescents.
Technology - Presented jointly to John Keogh of Hawthorn, Victoria, Australia, for patenting the wheel in the year 2001, and to the Australian Patent Office for granting him Innovation Patent #2001100012.
2002
Biology - Presented to Norma E. Bubier, Charles G.M. Paxton, Phil Bowers, and D. Charles Deeming of the United Kingdom, for their report "Courtship Behaviour of Ostriches Towards Humans Under Farming Conditions in Britain".
Chemistry - Presented to Theodore Gray of Wolfram Research, in Champaign, Illinois, for gathering many elements of the periodic table, and assembling them into the form of a four-legged periodic table table.
Economics - Presented to the executives, corporate directors, and auditors of Enron, Lernaut & Hauspie (Belgium), Adelphia, Bank of Commerce and Credit International (Pakistan), Cendant, CMS Energy, Duke Energy, Dynegy, Gazprom (Russia), Global Crossing, HIH Insurance (Australia), Informix, Kmart, Maxwell Communications (UK), McKessonHBOC, Merrill Lynch, Merck, Peregrine Systems, Qwest Communications, Reliant Resources, Rent-Way, Rite Aid, Sunbeam, Tyco, Waste Management, WorldCom, Xerox, and Arthur Andersen, for adapting the mathematical concept of imaginary numbers for use in the business world. (All companies except for Arthur Andersen were forced to restate their financial reports due to false or incorrect accounting. Andersen was the accounting firm most identified with the scandals, having been indicted on criminal charges stemming from its actions as auditor of Enron. All companies are U.S.-based unless otherwise noted.)
Hygiene - Presented to Eduardo Segura, of Lavakan de Aste, in Tarragona, Spain, for inventing a washing machine for cats and dogs.
Interdisciplinary Research - Presented to Karl Kruszelnicki of The University of Sydney, Australia, for performing a comprehensive survey of human belly button fluff -- who gets it, when, what color, and how much.
Literature - Presented jointly to Vicki L. Silvers of the University of Nevada-Reno and David S. Kreiner of Central Missouri State University, for their colorful report "The Effects of Pre-Existing Inappropriate Highlighting on Reading Comprehension".
Mathematics - Presented to K.P. Sreekumar and G. Nirmalan of Kerala Agricultural University, India, for their analytical report "Estimation of the Total Surface Area in Indian Elephants".
Medicine - Presented to Chris McManus of University College London, for his excruciatingly balanced report, "Scrotal Asymmetry in Man and in Ancient Sculpture".
Peace - Presented to Keita Sato, President of Takara Co., Dr. Matsumi Suzuki, President of Japan Acoustic Lab, and Dr. Norio Kogure, Executive Director, Kogure Veterinary Hospital, for promoting peace and harmony between the species by inventing Bow-Lingual, a computer-based automatic dog-to-human language translation device.
Physics - Presented to Arnd Leike of the University of Munich, for demonstrating that beer froth obeys the Mathematical Law of Exponential Decay.
2003
Biology - Presented to C.W. Moeliker, of Natuurmuseum Rotterdam, for documenting the first scientifically recorded case of homosexual necrophilia in the mallard duck.
Chemistry - Presented to Yukio Hirose of Kanazawa University, for his chemical investigation of a bronze statue, in the city of Kanazawa, that fails to attract pigeons.
Economics - Presented to Karl Schwärzler and the nation of Liechtenstein, for making it possible to rent the entire country for corporate conventions, weddings, bar mitzvahs, and other gatherings.
Engineering - Presented to John Paul Stapp, Edward A. Murphy, Jr., and George Nichols, for jointly giving birth in 1949 to Murphy's Law, the basic engineering principle that "If there are two or more ways to do something, and one of those ways can result in a catastrophe, someone will do it" (or, in other words: "If anything can go wrong, it will").
Interdisciplinary Research - Presented to Stefano Ghirlanda, Liselotte Jansson, and Magnus Enquis of Stockholm University, for their inevitable report "Chickens Prefer Beautiful Humans."
Literature - Presented to John Trinkaus, of the Zicklin School of Business, New York City, for meticulously collecting data and publishing more than 80 detailed academic reports about things that annoyed him, such as:
What percentage of young people wear baseball caps with the peak facing to the rear rather than to the front
What percentage of pedestrians wear sport shoes that are white rather than some other color
What percentage of swimmers swim laps in the shallow end of a pool rather than the deep end
What percentage of automobile drivers almost, but not completely, come to a stop at one particular stop-sign
What percentage of commuters carry attaché cases
What percentage of shoppers exceed the number of items permitted in a supermarket's express checkout lane
And what percentage of students dislike the taste of Brussels sprouts.
Medicine - Presented to Eleanor Maguire, David Gadian, Ingrid Johnsrude, Catriona Good, John Ashburner, Richard Frackowiak, and Christopher Frith of University College London, for presenting evidence that the hippocampi of London taxi drivers are more highly developed than those of their fellow citizens.
Peace - Presented to Lal Bihari, of Uttar Pradesh, India, for a triple accomplishment: First, for leading an active life even though he has been declared legally dead; second, for waging a lively posthumous campaign against bureaucratic inertia and greedy relatives; and third, for creating the Association of Dead People. Lal Bihari overcame the handicap of being dead, and managed to obtain a passport from the Indian government so that he could travel to Harvard to accept his Prize. However, the U.S. government refused to allow him into the country. His friend Madhu Kapoor therefore came to the Ig Nobel Ceremony and accepted the Prize on behalf of Lal Bihari. Several weeks later, the Prize was presented to Lal Bihari himself in a special ceremony in India.
Physics - Presented to Jack Harvey, John Culveno, Warren Payne, Steve Cowle, Michael Lawrance, David Stuart, and Robyn Williams of Australia, for their irresistible report "An Analysis of the Forces Required to Drag Sheep over Various Surfaces".
Psychology - Presented to Gian Vittorio Caprara and Claudio Barbaranelli of the University of Rome La Sapienza, and to Philip Zimbardo of Stanford University, for their discerning report "Politicians' Uniquely Simple Personalities".
2004
Biology - Presented to Ben Wilson of the University of British Columbia, Lawrence Dill of Simon Fraser University, Canada, Robert Batty of the Scottish Association for Marine Science, Magnus Whalberg of the University of Aarhus, Denmark, and Håkan Westerberg of Sweden's National Board of Fisheries, for showing that herrings apparently communicate by farting.
Chemistry - Presented to The Coca-Cola Company of Great Britain, for using advanced technology to convert liquid from the River Thames into Dasani, a transparent form of water, which for precautionary reasons has been made unavailable to consumers.
Economics - Presented to the Vatican, for outsourcing prayers to India.
Engineering - Presented jointly to Donald J. Smith and his father, Frank J. Smith, of Orlando, Florida, for patenting the comb over (U.S. Patent 4,022,227 )
Literature - Presented to The American Nudist Research Library of Kissimmee, Florida, for preserving nudist history so that everyone can see it.
Medicine - Presented jointly to Steven Stack of Wayne State University, Detroit, Michigan, and James Gundlach of Auburn University, Auburn, Alabama, for their published report "The Effect of Country Music on Suicide".
Peace - Presented to Daisuke Inoue of Hyōgo Prefecture, Japan, for inventing karaoke, thereby providing an entirely new way for people to learn to tolerate each other.
Physics - Presented jointly to Ramesh Balasubramaniam of the University of Ottawa, and Michael Turvey of the University of Connecticut and Haskins Laboratory, for exploring and explaining the dynamics of hula-hooping.
Psychology - Presented jointly to Daniel Simons of the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign and Christopher Chabris of Harvard University, for demonstrating that when people pay close attention to something, it's all too easy to overlook anything else -- even a woman in a gorilla suit. [See inattentional blindness]
Public Health - Presented to Jillian Clarke of the Chicago High School for Agricultural Sciences, and then Howard University, for investigating the scientific validity of the five-second rule about whether it's safe to eat food that's been dropped on the floor.
2005
Agricultural History - Presented to James Watson of Massey University, New Zealand, for his scholarly study, "The Significance of Mr. Richard Buckley's Exploding Trousers".
Biology - Presented jointly to Benjamin Smith of the University of Adelaide, Australia and the University of Toronto, Canada and the Firmenich perfume company, Geneva, Switzerland, and ChemComm Enterprises, Archamps, France; Craig Williams of James Cook University and the University of South Australia; Michael Tyler of the University of Adelaide; Brian Williams of the University of Adelaide; and Yoji Hayasaka of the Australian Wine Research Institute; for painstakingly smelling and cataloging the peculiar odors produced by 131 different species of frogs when the frogs were feeling stressed.
Chemistry - Presented jointly to Edward Cussler of the University of Minnesota and Brian Gettelfinger of the University of Minnesota and the University of Wisconsin-Madison, for conducting a careful experiment to settle the longstanding scientific question: can people swim faster in syrup or in water? It was found that swimmers in the experiment reach comparable velocity in both media.
Economics - Presented to Gauri Nanda of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, for inventing Clocky, an alarm clock that runs away and hides, repeatedly, thus ensuring that people DO get out of bed, and thus theoretically adding many productive hours to the workday.
Fluid Dynamics - Presented jointly to Victor Benno Meyer-Rochow of International University Bremen, Germany and the University of Oulu, Finland; and József Gál of Loránd Eötvös University, Hungary, for using basic principles of physics to calculate the pressure that builds up inside a penguin, as detailed in their report "Pressures Produced When Penguins Poo — Calculations on Avian Defecation".
Literature - Presented to the Internet entrepreneurs of Nigeria, for creating and then using e-mail to distribute a bold series of short stories, thus introducing millions of readers to a cast of rich characters — General Sani Abacha, Mrs. Mariam Sanni Abacha, Barrister Jon A Mbeki Esq., and others — each of whom requires just a small amount of expense money so as to obtain access to the great wealth to which they are entitled and which they would like to share with the kind person who assists them.
Medicine - Presented to Gregg A. Miller of Oak Grove, Missouri, in the U.S.A., for inventing Neuticles — artificial replacement testicles for dogs, which are available in three sizes, and three degrees of firmness.
Nutrition - Presented to Dr. Yoshiro Nakamatsu of Tokyo, Japan, for photographing and retrospectively analyzing every meal he has consumed during a period of 34 years (and counting).
Peace - Presented jointly to Claire Rind and Peter Simmons of University of Newcastle, in the UK, for electrically monitoring the activity of a brain cell in a locust while that locust was watching selected highlights from the movie Star Wars.
Physics - Presented jointly to John Mainstone and Thomas Parnell of the University of Queensland, Australia, for patiently conducting the so-called pitch drop experiment that began in the year 1927 — in which a glob of congealed black tar pitch has been slowly, slowly dripping through a funnel, at a rate of approximately one drop every nine years.
2006
Acoustics: D. Lynn Halpern of Harvard Vanguard Medical Associates, and Brandeis University, and Northwestern University, Randolph Blake of Vanderbilt University and Northwestern University and James Hillenbrand of Western Michigan University and Northwestern University for conducting experiments to learn why people dislike the sound of fingernails scraping chalkboard.
Biology: Bart Knols of Wageningen Agricultural University, in Wageningen, the Netherlands; and of the National Institute for Medical Research / Ifakara Centre, Tanzania, and of the International Atomic Energy Agency, in Vienna, Austria) and Ruurd de Jong of Wageningen Agricultural University and of Santa Maria degli Angeli, Italy for showing that the female malaria mosquito Anopheles gambiae is attracted equally to the smell of limburger cheese and to the smell of human feet.
Chemistry: Antonio Mulet, José Javier Benedito and José Bon of the Polytechnic University of Valencia, Spain, and Carmen Rosselló of the University of Illes Balears, in Palma de Mallorca, Spain, for their study "Ultrasonic Velocity in Cheddar Cheese as Affected by Temperature".
Literature: Daniel M. Oppenheimer of Princeton University for his report "Consequences of Erudite Vernacular Utilized Irrespective of Necessity: Problems with Using Long Words Needlessly".
Mathematics: Nic Svenson and Piers Barnes of the Australian Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organization, for calculating the number of photographs must be taken to (almost) ensure that nobody in a group photo will have their eyes closed.
Medicine: Francis M. Fesmire of the University of Tennessee College of Medicine, for his medical case report "Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage"; and Majed Odeh, Harry Bassan, and Arie Oliven of Bnai Zion Medical Center, Haifa, Israel, for their subsequent medical case report also titled "Termination of Intractable Hiccups with Digital Rectal Massage".
Nutrition: Wasmia Al-Houty of Kuwait University and Faten Al-Mussalam of the Kuwait Environment Public Authority, for showing that dung beetles are finicky eaters.
Ornithology: Ivan R. Schwab, of the University of California Davis, and Philip R.A. May of the University of California Los Angeles, for exploring and explaining why woodpeckers don't get headaches.
Peace: Howard Stapleton of Merthyr Tydfil, Wales, for inventing an electromechanical teenager repellant -- a device that makes annoying high-pitched noise designed to be audible to teenagers but not to adults; and for later using that same technology to make telephone ringtones that are audible to teenagers but probably not to their teachers.
Physics: Basile Audoly and Sebastien Neukirch of the Université Pierre et Marie Curie, for their analysis that explains why spaghetti breaks into several pieces when it is bent.
2007
Aviation: Patricia V. Agostino, Santiago A. Plano and Diego A. Golombek, for discovering that hamsters recover from jetlag more quickly when given Viagra.
Biology: Johanna E.M.H. van Bronswijk, for taking a census of all the mites and other life forms that live in people's beds.
Chemistry: Mayu Yamamoto for extracting vanilla flavour from cow dung.
Economics: Kuo Cheng Hsieh, for patenting a device to catch bank robbers by ensnaring them in a net.
Linguistics: Juan Manuel Toro, Josep B. Trobalon and Nuria Sebastian-Galles, for determining that rats sometimes can't distinguish between recordings of Japanese and Dutch played backward.
Literature: Glenda Browne, for her study of the word "the".[14]
Medicine: Dan Meyer and Brian Witcombe, for investigating the side-effects of swallowing swords.
Nutrition: Brian Wansink, for investigating people's appetite for mindless eating by secretly feeding them a self-refilling bowl of soup.
Peace: The Air Force Wright Laboratory in Dayton, Ohio, for suggesting the research and development of a "gay bomb," which would cause enemy troops to become sexually attracted to each other.
Physics: L. Mahadevan and Enrique Cerda Villablanca for their theoretical study of how sheets become wrinkled.
Mei long seems to have died peacefully as it was catching forty winks (Image: Mick Ellison, American Museum of Natural History)The first ever remains of a sleeping dinosaur have been found, providing support for the idea that small dinosaurs were the ancestors of flying birds.
Dr Xing Xu, of the Institute of Vertebrate Palaeontology and Palaeoanthropology at the Chinese Academy of Science in Beijing and Dr Mark Norell, of the American Museum of Natural History in New York have found a perfectly preserved 130 million-year-old new species of dinosaur in China.
They report their discovery in this week's issue of the journal Nature.
"This is the first report of sleeping behaviour in dinosaurs," said Xu. "We've never had any other information about a dinosaur sleeping."
The fossilised small two-legged dinosaur was found curled up with its head tucked under its forearm similar to how modern birds sleep.
Dubbed Mei long, which means "soundly sleeping dragon" in Chinese, the dinosaur was about 53 centimetres long or about the size of a large bird. Its size lends support to the theory that the small size of the dinosaur forebears of birds was crucial to their subsequent development of flight.
Skeleton of Mei long (Image: Xu Xing) "It is one of the most complete skeletons I have ever seen. It is a perfect preservation. We have almost every bone in the skeleton," Xu said. "There is no disturbance. The body is arranged in a life-like posture."
The sleeping skeleton was found near Beipiao City in Liaoning province, an area rich in fossils that have revealed secrets of dinosaur behaviour.
The sleeping posture indicates the characteristic probably originated in dinosaur ancestors of modern birds, said the resarchers.
Judging from its remarkably preserved state and position of the skeleton Mei long died a peaceful, and probably sudden, death.
Unlike other dinosaurs found with their neck extended back in a classic death pose, Mei long seemed to be sleeping contentedly when it died. Xu and Norell are not sure what killed the dinosaur but they said there are several possibilities.
It could have been starved of oxygen, buried under thick layers of volcanic ash or could have been sleeping in a cave or burrow when the roof collapsed.
"What you can see from the skeleton is that it died peacefully, quickly," said Xu.
Special Thanks to ABC
Friday, April 18, 2008
Top Ten Best Hospitals In The United States
1. Johns Hopkins Hospital, Baltimore, Md.
2. Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn.
3. Cleveland Clinic, Ohio
4. Massachusetts General Hospital, Boston
5. University of California, Los Angeles Medical Center
6. New York Presbyterian Hospital, New York, N.Y.
7. Duke University Medical Center, Durham, N.C.
8. Barnes-Jewish Hospital, St. Louis, Mo.
9. University of California, San Francisco Medical Center, San Francisco, Calif.
10. University of Washington Medical Center, Seattle, Wash.
2. Mayo Clinic, Rochester, Minn.
3. Cleveland Clinic, Ohio
4. Massachusetts General Hospital, Boston
5. University of California, Los Angeles Medical Center
6. New York Presbyterian Hospital, New York, N.Y.
7. Duke University Medical Center, Durham, N.C.
8. Barnes-Jewish Hospital, St. Louis, Mo.
9. University of California, San Francisco Medical Center, San Francisco, Calif.
10. University of Washington Medical Center, Seattle, Wash.
Chavez says US plans to kill him
Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez has said he believes the US government is planning to assassinate him.
"If they kill me, the name of the person responsible is [President] George Bush," Mr Chavez said.
Mr Chavez - who offered no evidence to back his claim - said any attempt on his life would backfire and threatened to cut off oil supplies to America.
He was apparently reacting to growing criticism by top US officials of his left-wing government.
"If, by the hand of the devil, those perverse plans succeed... forget about Venezuelan oil, Mr Bush"
Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez
US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has recently described the former paratrooper as a "negative force" in Latin America, while CIA chief Porter Goss said Venezuela was a possible source of instability in the region.
Washington accuses Mr Chavez of being heavy-handed towards Venezuela's opposition, and has recently criticised Caracas for arms purchases from Russia.
Diplomatic ties between Washington and Caracas have soured since Mr Chavez came to power in 1999.
There was no immediate response to his comments from Washington.
'No-nonsense talk'
"If, by the hand of the devil, those perverse plans succeed... forget about Venezuelan oil, Mr Bush, " Mr Chavez said during his weekly TV show.
Rice and other US officials have recently stepped up their criticism
"If you try, you will regret it Comrade Mr Bush."
Venezuela is one of the world's leading oil exporters - it sells about 1.5 million barrels a day to the US.
Mr Chavez has repeatedly accused the US of backing Venezuela's opposition to oust or even kill him, a charge Washington denies.
He has alleged that the White House played part in an April coup in 2002, which briefly removed him from power.
Mr Chavez's comments echoed the words of Cuban President Fidel Castro who said last week: "If Chavez is assassinated, the blame will fall on Bush."
"I say that as someone who has survived hundreds of the empire's (assassination) plans," Mr Castro added.
"Now, I am going to say it. Neither Fidel Castro nor I talk nonsense," Mr Chavez said on Sunday.
Special Thanks to the BBC
"If they kill me, the name of the person responsible is [President] George Bush," Mr Chavez said.
Mr Chavez - who offered no evidence to back his claim - said any attempt on his life would backfire and threatened to cut off oil supplies to America.
He was apparently reacting to growing criticism by top US officials of his left-wing government.
"If, by the hand of the devil, those perverse plans succeed... forget about Venezuelan oil, Mr Bush"
Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez
US Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has recently described the former paratrooper as a "negative force" in Latin America, while CIA chief Porter Goss said Venezuela was a possible source of instability in the region.
Washington accuses Mr Chavez of being heavy-handed towards Venezuela's opposition, and has recently criticised Caracas for arms purchases from Russia.
Diplomatic ties between Washington and Caracas have soured since Mr Chavez came to power in 1999.
There was no immediate response to his comments from Washington.
'No-nonsense talk'
"If, by the hand of the devil, those perverse plans succeed... forget about Venezuelan oil, Mr Bush, " Mr Chavez said during his weekly TV show.
Rice and other US officials have recently stepped up their criticism
"If you try, you will regret it Comrade Mr Bush."
Venezuela is one of the world's leading oil exporters - it sells about 1.5 million barrels a day to the US.
Mr Chavez has repeatedly accused the US of backing Venezuela's opposition to oust or even kill him, a charge Washington denies.
He has alleged that the White House played part in an April coup in 2002, which briefly removed him from power.
Mr Chavez's comments echoed the words of Cuban President Fidel Castro who said last week: "If Chavez is assassinated, the blame will fall on Bush."
"I say that as someone who has survived hundreds of the empire's (assassination) plans," Mr Castro added.
"Now, I am going to say it. Neither Fidel Castro nor I talk nonsense," Mr Chavez said on Sunday.
Special Thanks to the BBC
How To Make Invisible Ink
Here's How:
1. There are at least two methods to use baking soda as an invisible ink. Mix equal parts water and baking soda.
2. Use a cotton swab, toothpick, or paintbrush to write a message onto white paper, using the baking soda solution as 'ink'.
3. Allow the ink to dry.
4. One way to read the message is to hold the paper up to a heat source, such as a light bulb. The baking soda will cause the writing in the paper to turn brown.
5. Another is to submerge the paper in red cranberry or grape juice.
1. There are at least two methods to use baking soda as an invisible ink. Mix equal parts water and baking soda.
2. Use a cotton swab, toothpick, or paintbrush to write a message onto white paper, using the baking soda solution as 'ink'.
3. Allow the ink to dry.
4. One way to read the message is to hold the paper up to a heat source, such as a light bulb. The baking soda will cause the writing in the paper to turn brown.
5. Another is to submerge the paper in red cranberry or grape juice.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Egg McMuffin inventor dies at age 89
The man who brought breakfast to McDonald's when he invented the Egg McMuffin has died at the age of 89 on March 26, 2008.
Herb Peterson, who began his career with the fast food chain while working for its Chicago-based advertising firm, died peacefully at his home in Santa Barbara, California, yesterday.
While working on the McDonald's account, Peterson came up with the chain's first national advertising slogan - Where Quality Starts Fresh Every Day.
He then took over the running of a number of McDonald's outlets, and at the time of his death was the co-owner and operator of six restaurants in California.
Partial to eggs Benedict and keen to crack the market for morning trade, Peterson began working on a new sandwich for the fast food chain in the 1970s.
Breakfast had not even been an option at McDonald's before then, but in 1972 Peterson launched the Egg McMuffin at his one of his own restaurants in Santa Barbara.
The sandwich consisted of an egg that had been cooked in a Teflon circle with the yolk broken, topped with a slice of cheese and grilled Canadian bacon.
It was served open-faced on a toasted English muffin, and went on to become one of the most ubiquitous items on the McDonald's menu.
Although semi-retired, Peterson still visited all six of his stores in the Santa Barbara area until his health began to deteriorate last year.
"He would talk to the customers, visit with the employees - he loved McDonald's," Monte Fraker, a colleague from Santa Barbara, said.
"He embraced the community and the community embraced him. We loved the man."
Special Thanks to The Guardian
Sing A Song Of Six-Pence
Sing a song of sixpence,
A pocket full of rye;
Four and twenty blackbirds
Baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened,
They all began to sing.
Now, wasn't that a dainty dish
To set before the King?
The King was in his countinghouse,
Counting out his money;
The Queen was in the parlor
Eating bread and honey.
The maid was in the garden,
Hanging out the clothes.
Along there came a big black bird
And snipped off her nose!
History:
First published in 1744, the rhyme is one of many rhymes depicting bakers putting "suprises" in baked items.
A pocket full of rye;
Four and twenty blackbirds
Baked in a pie.
When the pie was opened,
They all began to sing.
Now, wasn't that a dainty dish
To set before the King?
The King was in his countinghouse,
Counting out his money;
The Queen was in the parlor
Eating bread and honey.
The maid was in the garden,
Hanging out the clothes.
Along there came a big black bird
And snipped off her nose!
History:
First published in 1744, the rhyme is one of many rhymes depicting bakers putting "suprises" in baked items.
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Peach Melba: Its History and a Recipe
Peach Melba is a classic dessert, invented in 1892 or 1893 by one of the worlds greatest French chefs, Auguste Escoffier at the Savoy Hotel, London to honour the Australian soprano, Dame Nellie Melba (1861 - 1931), after he heard her sing in ‘Lohengrin’.
At first the desert was peaches on vanilla ice cream, served between the wings of an ice-carved swan and covered with spun sugar. Later the dish was given its distinctive flavour by dispensing with the swan and spun sugar and covering the peaches and ice cream with fresh raspberry puree. The puree became known as ‘Sauce Melba.”
Today, Peche Melba is served in restaurants all over the world.
It combines two fruits: peaches and raspberry sauce accompanying vanilla ice cream.
½ cup sugar
2 cups water
1 vanilla bean
4 fresh peaches (peeled)
500g raspberries (fresh or frozen)
½ cup icing sugar
2 cups vanilla ice cream
1. Place sugar, water and vanilla bean in a saucepan over medium heat, and stir until sugar dissolves, then bring to a boil and simmer for 5 minutes.
2. Put peaches into in saucepan with syrup, cover and poach gently until tender, about 5 – 10 minutes.
3. Remove peaches from syrup, drain, then chill covered. Rub raspberries through a sieve or puree in a blender or food processor.
4. Add icing sugar gradually until sauce thickens.
5. Pile ice cream in a glass dish, and cover the top with peaches, halved, and spoon raspberry sauce over the peaches.
O'Reilly's Homophobia
"I think everybody's got to relax on all this gay stuff."
-- Bill O'Reilly, The O'Reilly Factor, August 15, 2007
From his suggestion that the "secular progressive movement" would like to have "poly-amorphous" marriage ("you can marry 18 people, you can marry a duck") to his statement that it would be "insane" and "inappropriate" to "cluster" gays near children, Bill O' Reilly has never been one to "relax on all this gay stuff."
When O'Reilly isn't dishing the homophobia himself, he's giving others a platform on his show to bash the LGBT community -- featuring guests like Marc Rudov, who recently advanced the bogus notion that "promoting a homosexual lifestyle" of gays and lesbians would cause "long-term consequences for children," that like a brain tumor, may take years to diagnose:
RUDOV: If there's going to be a brain tumor, it might not be discovered for 10 years -- and I kind of look at this in the same way, because children do form their sexual identities from their same-sex parents. And what's going on here is basically teaching children that there's no difference between a heterosexual marriage and a homosexual marriage.
Fox News and O'Reilly use the topic of same-sex couples and their families to promote his show and incite fear of the LGBT community. Never was this practice more clear than when Fox used footage from Rosie O'Donnell's cruise for gay and lesbian couples and their families to promote an upcoming edition of the Factor. The promo raised the question: "Is the media celebrating gay culture?" You can probably guess what the answer was.
Of course, we all know this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to O'Reilly and his attacks on the LGBT community.
Last October on his nationally syndicated radio program, The Radio Factor, O'Reilly began a multi-day tirade against Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling and her popular Potter character, Dumbledore. During a promotion for his television program on his radio show, he said: "We're also gonna tell you about Harry Potter and the gay agenda. Apparently that's goin' on." That night on Fox News' The O'Reilly Factor, he asked "Why have a gathering of Potter aficionados and then drop the gay bomb on them? Why do that? ... She did it to provoke. I think this is a provocateur." The next night he escalated the rhetoric even further when he said that:
"There are millions of Americans who feel that the media and the educational system is trying to indoctrinate their children to a certain way of life, and that includes parity for homosexuals with heterosexuals. And that's what this Rowling thing is all about, because she sells so many books. So many kids read it, that she comes out and says, 'Oh, Dumbledore is gay, and that's great.' And this -- it's another in the indoctrination thing. That's what the belief system is among some Americans."
After his guest, comedian Dennis Miller, pushed back by stating that children could not be indoctrinated into being gay, O'Reilly replied, "No, but tolerance. It's -- you know, he's not going to be gay, but it's tolerance of it."
Media Matters has documented numerous instances in which O'Reilly has attacked the LGBT community. Here are just three, but you can see the litany of his misinformation and attacks on the LGBT community at the end of this email:
O'Reilly criticized the inclusion of a lesbian couple as 'cutest couple' in a high school yearbook, saying: "I think private behavior belongs in private settings. ... I don't think it belongs in the high school yearbook." However, he said he would be OK with a heterosexual couple being cutest couple "because that is the norm of society."
O'Reilly suggested that allowing green cards for same-sex partners would lead to rampant immigration abuses.
O'Reilly called the San Diego Padres' decision to host a gay pride night and a children's hat giveaway promotion during the same baseball game "dumb," "almost unbelievable," and a "mistake." He said it was "insane" to "cluster" gay men and lesbians during a "hat giveaway for any kid under 12," later adding: "You're putting it in a kid's face at a baseball game." O'Reilly also said: "This is social engineering by the Padres."
It's time to tell O'Reilly and Fox News that enough is enough; if anyone should "relax on all this gay stuff," it's Bill O'Reilly. I hope you'll take a moment to contact Fox News and The O'Reilly Factor today and make sure your voice is heard.
Special Thanks to Media Matters
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